It’s not just snakes, it’s a friggin’ Anaconda! Which is, like, way more worst than just having snakes on you. Or so I’m told. But have no fear, David Hasselhoff is here to save the day, and he’s got a big ol rifle to do it, too. The folks behind “Anaconda: The Offspring”...

Now this is news I could certainly use, in a, “Well, it’s been a shitty day for movie news, so why not indulge in some Hoff action?” sort of way. According to the blokes over at Movie Hole, none other than David Hasselhoff, last seen splayed out in his hotel room eating remnants of...