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Halloween (1979) Movie Review
I know it’s hard to believe, but I’ve never seen John Carpenter’s “Halloween”. Yes, I admit it. Despite my affinity for Teen Slasher films of all stripes and budgets, I’m sorry to say that...
Read More »Acacia (2003) Movie Review
The most entertaining thing about “Acacia” isn’t the movie itself, which is mostly dull, plodding, and not very scary even though it’s billed as a horror film. It’s also not the movie’s Big Reveal,...
Read More »Tremors 4: The Legend Begins (2004) Movie Review
The “Tremors” franchise is an acquired taste. The cult following started with the 1990 original starring Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward. The sequel brought back Ward in 1996, but by then Bacon’s star was...
Read More »Into the Mirror (2003) Movie Review
“Into the Mirror” isn’t very original, and despite all of its visual wizardry, the story is heavily influenced by the Slow Bore Horror conventions popularized by “The Ring”. Depending on how you feel about...
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High Tension (2003) Movie Review
The French Slasher movie “Haute Tension” has been re-titled “Switchblade Romance” for its North American release. Why? I don’t know. I suppose movie execs are talentless hacks whether they are in France or America....
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Visitors (2003) Movie Review
I’ve never been particularly impressed with people who sail around the world on a boat, in a hot air balloon, or fly a plane, by themselves in an effort to set some record. The...
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Ginger Snaps 2: Unleashed (2004) Movie Review
“Abandon hope all who enters.” This should be the tagline for the “Ginger Snaps” franchise because it fits the films to a “T”. There is almost no hope, no ray of light, not even...
Read More »The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) Movie Review
Marcus Nispel’s “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” was billed as a “re-imagining” (the new Hollywood buzzword for “remake”) of Tobe Hooper’s 1974 low-budget original. And since every reputable and disreputable movie critic has compared the two...
Read More »American Psycho 2: All American Girl (2002) Movie Review
There’s something oddly entertaining about watching serial killer Mila Kunis stalking a college campus and leaving bodies lying nonchalantly everywhere, not unlike a rabid dog marking her passing. Maybe it’s because Kunis (“That 70′s...
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Ghost System (2002) Movie Review
Although it clocks in at just a shade over 70 minutes, writer/director Toshikazu Nagae’s “Ghost System” really has no business being a feature-length film. Or, in this case, a pseudo feature-length film. Aside from...
Read More »Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers – Producer’s Cut (1996) Movie Review
“Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers” is an example of how even a film budgeted at $2 million can experience the same problem as a big budget feature. Title changes, frustrated cast members,...
Read More »Wishcraft (2002) Movie Review
It used to be that I could watch 100 Direct-to-Video movies in a row and not find a single good one in the bunch. At least not good enough to ever get over the...
Read More »Whispering Corridors (1998) Movie Review
If South Korean movies set in high school have thought me anything, it’s not to go to high school in South Korea! If the teachers aren’t beating the living hell out of you on...
Read More »Cube Zero (2004) Movie Review
Ah, the boot. A cube prisoner’s best friend. Aside from the vast usefulness of something so minor, “Cube Zero” offers up your usual crop of bickering characters, a strong female lead, a psycho waiting...
Read More »Cabin Fever (2003) Movie Review
As was the case with Rob Schmidt’s “Wrong Turn”, you must have an easy familiarity with Teen Slasher movies in order to fully appreciate what Eli Roth’s “Cabin Fever” does right, because the movie...
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Deadline (2002) Movie Review
I guess it was only a matter of time before the rest of Europe gave in and offered up their own version of a zombie movie. The Italians nearly killed off the genre in...
Read More »House of the Dead (2003) Movie Review
Genre movies are notorious for lying through their teeth. The favorite lie that everyone knows, but no one really seems bothered by, is obvious 20-something actors playing teens. “House of the Dead”, the latest...
Read More »Vlad (2003) Movie Review
I’m certain that, once upon a time, it must have seem like a novel idea to make a movie about the “real” Vlad the Impaler, aka Dracula, aka the original source behind all the...
Read More »Flesh for the Beast (2003) Movie Review
What can I say about “Flesh for the Beast” except, well, it has a pretty nice title. And the movie poster is definitely a classy act. Unfortunately the film is neither classy nor nice,...
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Moon Child (2003) Movie Review
Takahisa Zeze’s “Moon Child” is artistically very satisfying, but is unfortunately very generic. Gackt Camui, a big pop star in his native Japan, stars as Sho, a Japanese street urchin making a tough living...
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