Eminem to Show off Mad Thespian Skillz in 3D Shady Talez

Wait, didn’t Snoop Dogg already did something similar? Anyways, not content to wow the world with his amazing ability to recite lines about the crack whoreness of his mom and prone-to-bitchiness wife, rapper Eminem will return to the big screen in the 3D film “Shady Talez”. That’s pronounced “Shady Tales“, you see, the “z” in place of the “s” is just to make it look cooler. Because Eminem knows from coolness. So moving on.

The film will be Eminem’s first in over seven years, since his debut in 2002’s “8 Miles”, a movie where Eminem played a white trash kid from Detroit who dreams of becoming a big rapper, but no one gave him a chance, and still our white trash kid kept plugging until respect was given. Word! It was a stretch, we know, but that’s just how talented Slim Shady is.

The 3D “Shady Talez” is being written by Kevin Grevioux (”Underworld”) and Dallas Jackson, and will be in the vein of “Creepshow” and “The Twilight Zone”. Since the title is “Shady Talez”, which references Eminem’s nickname, my guess is that the rapper will play the role of a Creeper-ish character, who introduces different tales or shows up in cameos via Rod Serling. I could be wrong, of course, but that seems highly probable.

Look for it in 2010.

Don't do it, Eminem, you have so much to live for!