Archive | July, 2006

Samaire Armstrong Looks Like a 12-Year Old Boy

11 July 2006

Earlier today I posted about how Natalie Portman may be starring in “Indiana Jones 4″, and I made the crack that because of her short status and titless disposition that Miss Portman would be playing Indy’s 12-year old son. Oh boy do I owe Natalie an apology after seeing these photos of “Entourage” and “The [...]

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More Proof Paris Hilton is Mentally Challenged

11 July 2006

File this one under, “This girl is so desperate to start a trend that she’ll keep wearing those fugly glasses no matter how retarded they make her look.” Here’s Paris Hilton, thinking she looks original and “cute” (I think that’s the word she would use) with her giant glasses on during a photoshoot. Seriously, folks, [...]

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Neve Campbell is Forlorn

11 July 2006

Former “Party of Five” sweetheart Neve Campbell has taken a curiously (and brave) independent detour with her movie career, starring in a couple of little known “art” films for the heck of it. In 2004, she was in a movie called “When Will I Be Loved”, written and directed by James Toback, that exactly four [...]

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This Week’s Feel Good Episode: When Brazilian Supermodels Touch

11 July 2006

In this week’s very special episode of Maury, we explore what happens when two very hot Brazilian supermodels touch. And by “touch” I mean get in nothing but bikinis and rub their butt cheeks together. Oh yes. Brazil. Thank you. Here’s fellow Brazilian Victoria’s Secret supermodels Adriana Lima (virgin my ass!) and Ana Beatriz Barros [...]

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A Nip Slip-Less Bai Ling? Oh Hell No!

11 July 2006

Geez, what is the world coming to when you can’t even count on kooky as all get out Chinese actress Bai Ling to do a little nip slippage for the good folks. Or how about a little see-through action? I mean, the woman was on the beach, covered in water, and not a single pokie? [...]

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Natalie Portman Joins “Indiana Jones 4″

11 July 2006

Rumor has it (or actually, Karen Allen’s big mouth has it) that Natalie Portman, fresh off fighting Movie Bush in “V for Vendetta”, will be joining a geriatric Harrison Ford to fight, one presumes, either Nazis or snakes. Indy hates snakes, if you haven’t heard. But no truth to the rumor that the dimunitive Portman [...]

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More Jill Wagner (And Some FHM Pics)

10 July 2006

If you haven’t been watching SpikeTV’s “Blade: The Series”, then — er, well, you’re like me, because that show sucks, but I digress. Here’s a little more of the show’s female star, Jill Wagner, who plays an ex-commando badass who gets bitten by a vampire, becomes a vampire, but starts fighting them by joining forces [...]

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Gisele Bundchen in Arena Magazine

10 July 2006

Let me confess: I’m not as nuts over Gisele Bundchen as most of my fellow red-blooded American males. I don’t know why. She’s certainly attractive enough, and that body is just killer. Then again, she did use to date that dickweed Leonardo DiCaprio, so that’s a strike against her. But I digress. Here’s the blonde [...]

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Lindsay Lohan Bikini Pictures Version 4.0

10 July 2006

Or is that Version 5.0? Who knows. Even I can’t keep track of my own made-up crap. Oh well, here’s Lindsay Lohan in a green two-piece bikini. The frecklelicious star of such masterworks of cinema as “Freaky Friday” and “Just My Luck” seems to get a kick out of parading around in different bikinis everyday [...]

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Halle Berry is Dating a White Guy

10 July 2006

A white surfer dude, to be precise. Halle Berry’s last “man” was her husband, who was black, but who she dumped because he was addicted to sex and kept straying. How anyone would be addicted to sex and stray away from Halle Berry is one of those mysteries only Jesus himself could comprehend. Anyways, here’s [...]

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Paris Hilton’s CD Cover

10 July 2006

Here’s the CD cover for Paris Hilton’s upcoming music debut for those of you who cares. I don’t know the title of the album, and I don’t really want to know, so don’t ask. Anyways, was there ever any doubt that Paris would be doing the unnatural head tilting pose of hers on her CD [...]

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Michelle Hunziker Beach Bikini Pictures

10 July 2006

Even if you don’t have a clue who Michelle Hunziker is, you still gotta admit that the woman has one fabuloso body. Some people were just made to wear two-piece bikinis, and others aren’t. Michelle falls into the former category. Born a Swiss, Michelle somehow found herself in Italy, where she became a TV celebrity [...]

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Kristen Bell Shape Magazine Bikini Pictures

10 July 2006

Holy shi-ite, Kristen Bell of “Veronica Mars” fame is friggin hot. I mean, Jesus Christ, she’s “hot” in the sense that, “Holy crap, I didn’t know she was that hot.” Here are some Kristen Bell bikini pictures in Shape Magazine. Now if you’ll excuse me I gotta run out and buy some “Veronica Mars” DVD [...]

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Kate Hudson Beach Bikini Pictures

9 July 2006

Oh Dear Lord, will the parade of Hollywood hotties in bikinis frolicking about on the beach never end? Mind you, not that I’m complaining. Joining the neverending parade of high-priced flesh and boobies this time around is Kate Hudson, daughter of Kurt and Goldie, and star of such high-falutin’ art masterpieces such as “How to [...]

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Sunday Surprise: Veronika Varekova

9 July 2006

Another most excellent import from Eastern Europe, this time it’s Sports Illustrated and Victoria’s Secret supermodel Veronica Varekova, who hails from Czech. She’s a natural blonde beauty with outrageously perfect curves. She was recently #32 in Maxim Magazine’s Hot 100 for 2006 list, but you might have caught a glimpse of the supermodel when she [...]

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More Pamela Anderson Bikini Pictures

9 July 2006

The parade of hot celebrities in bikinis vacationing continues with another look at former starlet turned, er, I dunno know, what does Pamela Anderson qualify as nowadays? Well, having failed to come up with a proper description for the former “Baywatch” babe, here are some pictures of her vacationing on a yacht with her young’uns. [...]

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Leslie Bibb in Stuff Magazine

8 July 2006

Very tall and blonde drink of water Leslie Bibb, star of “Crossing Jordan” and my wet dreams, makes an appearance in Stuff Magazine but forgot her clothes. Well, she did remember the bra and panties, which is good enough. The whole Nascar theme of the shoot is, of course, to promote Leslie’s new movie “Talladega [...]

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Weekend Treat: Aida Yespica and a Lucky Stripper Pole

8 July 2006

This weekend’s weekend treat is Aida Yespica, who is seriously in danger of turning this feature into “Treat or Treat or Maybe Both” with her work on a pole. As in stripper pole. As in Aida Yespica practicing her stripper moves on a stripper pole. As in that thing hot women slink on to make [...]

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Lindsay Lohan is Stretchy…in a Bikini

7 July 2006

Once again, a very top-heavy (if you know what I mean) Lindsay Lohan does the two-piece bikini thing on somebody’s balcony (I think) for the sake of lecherous men everywhere. As their President, I’d like eto personally thank Lindsay for her contribution. Take a look a these photos and tell me she doesn’t know the [...]

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Jessica Simpson in “Employee of the Month” Poster

6 July 2006

Jessica Simpson isn’t what you would call talented. Oh sure, I think she can sing. Maybe. But acting? I never saw the remake of “The Dukes of Hazzard,”, but since the only thing that movie required her to do was look skinny while wearing next to nothing, I’m going to assume it didn’t take a [...]

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