The Random Stuff of Interests Page

Did I Mention Candice Swanepoel is Kinda Not Ugly?

South African Victoria’s Secret model Candice Swanepoel is what you would call not ugly. As in, “Man, that girl is so not ugly, I’d drink her bathwater.” Plus, it’d probably taste like cinnamon and perfume, too. Mind you, not that I know what perfume tastes like. I mean, what am I, weak in the head? I don’t go around drinking perfume. At least, not anymore. Ahem. Anyways, here’s Candice Swanepoel, looking all kinds of fine in her Victoria’s Secret best. By the way, Victoria’s secret? The awesome superpower to hire awesome looking supermodels. Awesome!

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Candice Swanepoel Bikini Modeling Goodness

Candice Swanepoel is a model, and every now and then she has to slip on the ol bikini to make the check to pay the rent. Hey, it’s better than having to hand out coupons while dressed as a big bacon sandwich, am I right? Then again, a bacon sandwich costume is pretty comfy in the Winter time, but don’t tell anyone I said that. Anyways, here’s Candice Swanepoel doing what models do best, which is look good in very little. Oh, models, will your ability to make us happy never cease?

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Mondays with Candice Swanepoel on the Runway

When models do that whole runway thing where they walk 20 yards forward and then 20 yards back, what do you think they’re thinking of? Are they thinking, “Geez, I hope I don’t fall and end up on YouTube!” Or are they actually checking out all the people sitting around them snapping pictures and jotting down notes? After all, there are a lot of celebrities at these fashion shows nowadays, so you’ll tend to get a lot of celebrities. Do you think the female models check out the male celebrities and think, “Dang, I wanna jump his bones”? I’m just thinking out loud, is all. Anyways, here’s Candice Swanepoel to start off your Monday doing the runway thang, as is her profession.

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Victoria’s Secret Angels at the Beach. In Bikinis. Thank You, God.

So in case you missed it (what are you, stupid?), the Victoria’s Secret fashion show brought its whiz-bang over to Miami Beach for one of those exclusive fashion shows where hot girls dress up in lingerie and pretend they want to do you. All of you. Even Slow Johnny, who can barely answer the phone without vomiting. Anyhoo. So, while in Miami Beach, the Victoria’s Secret angels decided to go out for a walk on the beach. In matching white two-piece bikinis. Okay, so it was more like another crass commercial photoshoot, but am I complaining? Hell no! There were way too many angels there to get them all, but all the major ones were there, including Miranda Kerr, Marisa Miller, Alessandra Ambrosio, Doutzen Kroes, Karolina Kurkova, Adriana Lima, Candice Swanepoel. So what do you do when you have these many hot girls in bikinis at the same place? Well, trying to get them all into your eyeball would just damage your eyeballs beyond reason, so let’s play “Find the Victoria’s Secret Angel with the tramp stamp!” One of them has it. Can you name her? I bet you can’t!

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Your Post-Turkey Treat: Candice Swanepoel

So it’s Friday, the day after you stuffed your face with turkey, gravy, mash potatoes, and if you’re really lucky, homemade from scratch stuffing. So what now? Um, sit back, watch some college football (the big boys played on Thursday while you were stuffing your said face), and enjoy some more of Candice Swanepoel. Yes, I just posted the first pictures of her a few days back, but what the hell, are you complaining? Man, I should just come over there and punch you in your turkey stuffing face, ya bastards. Anyhoo. Candice Swanepoel. Please to enjoy.

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Random Supermodel of the Day: Candice Swanepoel

I know that Candice Swanepoel is a supermodel, and thus she fits in our Random Supermodel of the Day column, even though I can’t really find much in the way of a biography on her via the net. Two things are in Candice Swanepoel’s favor: 1) she’s a Victoria’s Secret supermodel, which basically guarantees her place in the supermodel pantheon, and 2) she looks really, really, REALLY good in lingerie. And come on, at the end of the day, isn’t that all that’s required of someone who calls themselves a supermodel? That they look so stunning in lingerie that seeing them makes you want to run out and buy some for your non-existent girlfriend? I know it has that effect on me!

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