So what’s worst than Monday? Having to drag yourself out of bed and get into that shower (which is always too damn cold, am I right or am I right?), then trudge on over to the bar and begin the long, long drive to work, all the while knowing that you have to do this four more times before the week is over and the weekend is here again. Yup, Mondays suck. But you know what doesn’t suck? Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pictures from back when she was somewhere doing the bikini thing and someone was there to snap the pictures. God bless whoever invented the camera. You rock, man, you really rock.
3 February 2009
Being married to a famous actress rocks. First, you’ve got that whole “my wife’s a famous actress, what does your wife do?” thing going on for ya, but to top it off, she’s never out of shape or never looking good. Well, for the most part. Even when she squirts out a kid, there is an army of personal trainers to put her back into shape, just like the hottie you married. Of course, finding a famous actress to get hitched to is the hard part, but I’m sure you’ll figure it out. In the meantime, here’s Jaime Pressly of My name is Earl fame in the latest issue of Shape Magazine showing off that nice body and how she gets it. In a word, personal trainers. In two words, hot.
28 January 2009
So apparently the Miss USA pageant was held last weekend on some basic cable channel that no one watched. Or at least, I didn’t watch, because I didn’t know Katie Stam from Indiana had been crowned Miss America until these bikini pictures of her showed up on the Internet. And yes, I’m pretty sure that Katie Stam might just be the most fit (some would say TOO fit) winner in the history of the Miss USA pageant. I could be wrong, of course, but I don’t think girls looked like Katie Stam, oh, 20 or even 10 years ago. Not sure how she’s going to fare at the Miss Universe (or is that Miss World? Well, one of those) pageants later in the year, but if those bikini pictures are any indication, she could certainly take them ALL on at once.
27 January 2009
If you don’t watch ABC’s The Bachelor Reality TV show, then you’re missing out on some Melissa Rycroft goodness. Who is Melissa Rycroft you ask? Well she’s a really attractive girl who did a lot of modeling before showing up on The Bachelor. And before that, she was also a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. Now most people would prefer to see a hot girl in a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, but me, I prefer them in a bikini. Call me crazy, but a bikini just looks better than a cheerleader outfit. Okay, so maybe that’s not too crazy, which means I’m perfectly normal. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Anyhoo. Check out some Melissa Rycroft bikini pictures and gawk your ass off.
27 January 2009
Don’t ask me to name any of Rihanna’s songs, because I haven’t a clue. But you know what I do have a clue about? These bikini pictures of Rihanna in the recent issue of GQ magazine are pretty sweet. In fact, these pictures are so great, I’ve just run out to the music store and bought a Rihanna CD and I intend to listen to it. Oh who am I kidding. I don’t have money to buy music, silly! I actually just went next door and stole my neighbor’s Rihanna CD, which is pretty amazing, considering my neighbor is deaf and doesn’t even own a CD player. Go figure! Anyways, Rihanna in bikini in GQ. Not crazy about the hair, though, but oh well.
26 January 2009
If you’re one of those people who thinks Gabrielle Anwar is about 10 pounds short of looking perfect, I don’t know if I would disagree with you. Sure, she’s a tad thin, but you gotta admit, thin sorta fits Gabrielle Anwar. She was never the tallest or biggest girl to come out of Hollywood, so what did we expect, she would get suddenly fat? As these images from the most recent episode of Burn Notice proves, Gabrielle Anwar and her uber tight body are two major reasons to watch Burn Notice. Okay, so the show is pretty cool, too, but you gotta admit, it wouldn’t be nearly as watchable without Gabrielle Anwar strutting around in those tight dresses and, in this episode, bikini. Oh my.
26 January 2009
Alessandra Ambrosio would like you kids out there to know that Marisa Miller and Miranda Kerr aren’t the only Victoria’s Secret supermodels to be hitting the beach over the weekend, as she spent the weekend doing likewise, showing off that certain something that has made her millions over the years. I’m of course talking about her brains. Isn’t that what all supermodels are known for? Their brains? Okay, sorry, even I can’t keep going with that, that’s how ridiculous it sounded. Anyways, here’s Alessandra Ambrosio getting all bikini-licious and probably getting a man or two slapped in the face as they inadvertently stared for too long and got caught by their girlfriend or wife. Sorry, boys, but what hurts you doesn’t hurt me none!
22 January 2009
I don’t know about the rest of you guys, but I am so sick and tired of posting pictures of Marisa Miller in a bikini flaunting her God given assets. Okay, Marisa, we get it, you’re hot (I mean really, really hot) but can you please keep yourselves covered for at least one day? God, it’s like, every single day, we gotta be seeing her in a bikini or in lingerie or something. Frankly, it’s getting a little old — JUST KIDDING! What are we, retarded? The day we can’t appreciate Marisa Miller in a bikini at the beach is the day I close up this site and go into the priesthood. Having said that — Marisa Miller bikini pictures at the beach! There IS a God, after all.
21 January 2009
So girls, has this ever happened to you? Your boyfriend/husband/lesbian lover invites you to the beach, and you think, “Cool, this is the perfect time to show off my brand new Jenny Craig body! Thanks, Jenny Craig!” And as soon as you arrive at the beach, who is already there, but a Victoria’s Secret supermodel in an itty bitty bikini? Man, talk about a bummer! Granted, Miranda Kerr is no Marisa Miller, and her body, though quite nice, is not the tight, incredible physique of a Marisa, but it’s not like we’re looking at chop liver here, kids. Check out Miranda Kerr getting in on the bikini action in a public beach. What are the chances that you’ll run into a Victoria’s Secret supermodel at the beach? Probably better than average if you’ve been stalking her. If not, then not so much.
20 January 2009
I don’t know who is running the show over there at American Idol this year, but they sure are doing a lot of things right. First, adding the really hot fourth judge certainly helps. How many times can you look at Simon Cowell’s man nipples, Paula Abdul’s utterly insane eyes, and Randy Jackson’s stupid stupidity before you get fed up? In Season 8, the producers have spiced up the show with a new, hot judge and they’re showing off a ton of really easy-on-the-eyes contestants, including the aforementioned former bikini model turned singer Casey Carlson, and of course, Katrina Darrell. Who is Katrina Darrell? She’s the girl who went to the audition in a two-piece bikini. Yeah, it takes a lot of gumption to do that, kids. Gumption and a hot body, of course. Looking forward to more of that bikini — er, I mean, her singing voice!
15 January 2009
If you were watching American Idol last night, you might have noticed an incredibly cute girl with a great voice named Casey Carlson. Okay, maybe you noticed, but your eyes didn’t bug out by how hot she was. Don’t worry, it’s not your fault, your eyes are just fine. The problem is that Casey Carlson was wearing way too much clothing during the audition. But apparently it wasn’t always that way, because Casey Carlson used to be a bikini model, and once upon a time she modeled for the site Campus Girls USA in a swimsuit and bikini, and yes, I think you can guess which pictures we’re going to be going for, the swimsuit or the bikini? Um, let’s see. Yeah, let’s go with the bikini pics. Oh my! Check out more of Casey in her half-naked best over at Campus Girls USA.
14 January 2009
Kate Hudson bikini pictures are always cause for concern. New Kate Hudson bikini pictures make me want to jump on my dinner table and jump for joy. Which, let me say, would be a a pretty incredible feat, especially since I don’t own a dinner table, or has ever been close to one. I take my food from a bowl on the couch, in case you were wondering. That’s just how we roll in the Random Page Household, bitches. But where was I? Oh right, some new Kate Hudson bikini pictures for you boyos. These aren’t nearly the gangbuster hotness of the previous ones from last year, but you know, Kate Hudson is a mother a couple of times over, and that’s still a pretty rocking body, kids.
12 January 2009
Lindsay Lohan in a bikini. Wow. When was the last time we saw this? I remember it well. Way back in the summer of 2006. Back when you couldn’t go a day without Lindsay parading around in a different itty bitty bikini. Back then, ol Lindsay was feeling her oats something mighty, and could care less if the world got a glimpse of her many, oh so many freckles. She was hot, alright, and she knew it, and she wanted you to know and appreciate it too. Nowadays, all you hear from Lindsay is how she’s trying to quit the booze and drugs and how she’s dating some lesbian DJ chick. You know, totally uninteresting stuff from a male point of view. I mean, God, the lesbian chick is uglier than some of the guys that regularly cranks one off to those stripper scenes from “I Know Who Killed Me”, for God’s sake. But wait — Lindsay is back in a bikini in 2009! Hallelujah! Now maybe she can trade up for a lipstick lesbian. Can you say, instant threesome fantasies?
8 January 2009
You may have heard, but word is the girls on the new version of the Beverly Hills 90210 show are a tad, shall we say, thin. Okay, let’s admit it, people have downright accused them of being anorexic. Now I haven’t watched the show enough to say either way, but I did see these bikini pictures of one of the girls, AnnaLynne McCord, and she doesn’t look all that bad. Except for that one picture where she’s reaching up to catch the ball, and you can basically count every single ribcage the girl has, but as for the rest of the pics, not too bad. Maybe she’s just naturally thin? It could be. Of course I wouldn’t know, being that I have a perfect body since birth. Yes, I’m a God. What of it? Anyways, bikini pics of AnnaLynne McCord.
6 January 2009
How could you not dig Olivia Munn? You would have to be two shades of retarded not to think that Olivia Munn is a pretty groovy gal. Besides the fact that she looks good in a two-piece bikini, but she seems to know what the boys like, and has no problems giving it to them, as evidence by these bikini pictures of our Gal Geek taken in Hawaii and posted on her blog HeyOlivia, which I’m assuming is what she hears a lot at nerd conventions, probably followed by, “…will you go home to meet my mom? She doesn’t believe we’re dating!” These bikini pics were posted under the title of “First batch of Hawaii Photos”, which means there are more to come. Joy joy!
30 December 2008
Yeah, yeah, I know I said I wouldn’t be posting again until the new year, but you know what? Some things just can’t wait. One of those things are pictures of Kristen Bell in a two-piece bikini looking, as the kids would say, all hot and shit. As a fan of Kristen Bell bikini pictures, I can tell you that you don’t run across these very often. Okay, so maybe you do run across them quite often, as our little Kristen Bell is not exactly the shy kind. You saw a heck of a lot of her in a bikini in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”, and you’re guaranteed to see more of her in a bikini in her new movie, a romantic comedy called “Couples Retreat”. Yep, that’s right: Kristen Bell is so cool, she did a couple of crappy romantic comedies just so you could go see her in the movie theater, while telling your imaginary girlfriend from Canada that you’re actually treating her to a chick flick! Oh, Kristen, is there nothing you won’t do for us men?
4 December 2008
On her new CW TV show Valentine, hot to trot British import Jaime Murray plays Aphrodite, the Greek Goddess of Love, whose job is to make people fall in love. And you know something? The real Aphrodite WISHES she could look as hot as Jaime Murray. Here’s that bikini scene from a recent episode, which has Jaime Murray lounging about an outdoor pool before getting up to answer a call, revealing what can only be described as a truly incredible body covered in an itty bitty two-piece bikini. Oh my. And here I thought the only thing the CW was good for was to fill out my TV channels and every now and then air an episode of Supernatural. Jaime Murray bikini scene from Valentine ahoy!
24 November 2008
Julianne Hough was in Shape Magazine a little whiles back, but being that I wasn’t paying attention, or was on a Julianne Hough kick back then, here she is in her bikini best on the cover and interior pages. Yes, we’re late, but as I like to say, better late than never. Which is right up there with my other favorite saying, “If it don’t hurt, then keep punching him until he’s bleeding out of his ears, cause he probably has it coming, and if he didn’t, well, tough cookies, biotch!” But where was I? Oh right, here’s Julianne Hough on Shape magazine. As with all the babes that show up on Shape, Julianne Hough is in a two-piece bikini and showing off her ability to stretch. God, dancers rule. Plus, a video of the shoot, cause I care, that’s why.
24 November 2008
God bless the Aussies. You’d never catch our American beauty pageants doing something like this. And by “this” I mean show up in a men’s magazine in a two-piece bikini looking all kinds of hot. Yes, American beauty queens are required to look hot, but definitely not THIS hot. Which just goes to show you what kind of a crappy beauty queen system we have in this country, but hey, it’s not like anyone takes these things too seriously, right? Okay, the people who run the thing do, but they’re a bunch of old school geezers anyway, so who cares what they think. Anyhoo, here’s Laura Dundovic, aka Miss Australia for the country’s Miss Universe pageant (remember, there are two pageants — Miss Universe and Miss World?), showing that you can be a beauty queen as well as a smoking hot beauty queen. Take notes, American beauty queens.
18 November 2008
I haven’t a clue what Stacy Keibler has been doing with her time lately, but missing out on her daily runs to the gym was definitely NOT one of them. The girl still looks gangbusters, let me tell you. Which begs the question: what are the chances that we’ll see Stacy Keibler in one of those late-night erotic thrillers? Here’s hoping, right? Anyways, so what’s the best way for Stacy Keibler to let people know that she’s still around and waiting for someone to put her in a big movie? Slip on that itty bitty bikini and hit the beach, perhaps? Hey, if you got it, flaunt it, I always say. Which is why I always go to the beach in a muscle shirt and short-shorts every chance I get. The girls totally dig it. True story. Anyways, Stacy Keibler in a bikini at the beach. Please to enjoy.
9 February 2009