No More Meat for Jenna Jameson
Jenna Jameson has officially said “no mas” to meat. Er, I mean, you know, the beef kind, not the, er, other kind. (She’s also retired from porn, too, FYI.) Anyways, it’s confession time: back in the day, when I was a younger man, I might have indulged in a Jenna Jameson movie or two. Or twenty. Look, I was really lonely back then, okay? But I digress. What I’m trying to say is, the Jenna Jameson that I used to watch on all those lonely nights (and morning, and afternoon) look nothing like the Jenna Jameson that I’m seeing now. I don’t know what she’s gone and done with herself, maybe it’s just the massive weight loss that has altered her features nearly completely. Which goes to show you that meat is good for you, especially retired porn princesses. Here’s Jenna Jameson showing off her new PETA ad.
Jenna Jameson Supports the Troops
Adult film actress Jenna Jameson would like you to know that, despite the fact that she makes a living having sex with strange men (or at least she used to; she’s retired, so I hear), that doesn’t mean she loves our troops any less. In fact, Jenna Jameson is so for the troops that she recently attended a USO “Support the Troops” function in Washington, looking extremely good and not all that skinny. I don’t know if she’s put on a little bit of (much needed) weight, or if the dress is hiding the skin and bones, but I gotta say, after seeing these pictures, I now remember what I, and every men out there, saw in her when we ran out and bought all her movies the moment they came out. Let’s hope she keeps it up!
Jenna Jameson and her New Collagen Lips?
I don’t know what’s happened to Jenna Jameson lately. There’s that whole thing about her having gotten so ridiculously skinny, and then a few weeks ago she announced that she was removing her gazonkas (aka breast implants) and retiring from the adult film business. And now? Now it looks like she’s got collagen shot into her lips to puff them up. I’m no doctor or anything, but that’s what my very untrained eye sees from these pictures. I love Jenna Jameson, don’t get me wrong. Hell, I grew up with the girl and her movies, and it’s a little disheartening for me to see her literally devolve before our eyes. Come on, Jenna, get it together, girl! Come baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.
Jenna Jameson Says No to Breast Implants
The big news out of the porn industry (what, don’t you keep up? I know I do!) is that Jenna Jameson has decided to pluck out her breast implants and go au natural with her 32C size. This is either a really bad idea or a really good idea, but being that Jenna Jameson makes a living showing off those gazongas she calls breasts in adult movies and on her website, I’m going to have to go with the former. Let’s face it, kids; Jenna Jameson didn’t become famous because of her acting talents, if you know what I mean. Then again, it’s not like she’s doing a whole lot of movies nowadays (or so I’ve heard, ahem), so perhaps the implants are no longer really an issue. In any case, thanks for the mammaries, Jenna.
Jenna Jameson Bikini Pictures
Before you even ask, let me just say that I absolutely have no idea about the context behind these pictures of former porn queen (does she even still do adult movies?) Jenna Jameson on the beach in a two-piece bikini posing very oddly for the camera. And yes, she is looking very, very skinny. I don’t keep up with Jenna Jameson’s life or anything, but as I recall, she has admitted to having a eating disorder (or maybe I’m wrong and she never did, I can’t be sure, don’t take my word for it, no one does), and wow, skin and bones, man. I’m not sure if those inflated boobs can even support that skeletal frame anymore. But oddly enough, I am still super aroused. Hmm…
Savanna Samson Endorces Rudy Giuliani
Having a porn star endorse your candidacy for President is kind of like getting shot in the head in a bar when you only went in there to use the payphone in the first place. But don’t tell Jenna Jameson or Savanna Samson that — the two porn stars have publicly backed different candidates. It’s Hillary Clinton for Jameson, and Rudy Giuliani for Samson. And since Savanna is hotter and doesn’t look like a walking skeleton every other week, I’m gonna go with her. Rudy it is!
Porn Princess Jenna Jameson Supports Hillary Clinton
In case you were still undecided about who you will be voting for in the upcoming 2008 Presidential Election, maybe Jenna Jameson can help you out. According to everyone’s favorite porn princess (who I must say is looking much healthier, and sexier than ever, these days), the election of Hillary Clinton to the White House would help out the porn industry, because, says Jameson, the porn biz had its best time when Clinton was in the Oral Office. Er, I mean, Oval Office. But call me crazy, but I don’t think Hillary is going to be trumping this endorsement. I don’t know why not. Jenna Jameson is probably more popular than Hillary will ever be. Or at the very least, Jenna has had more sex in one day than Hillary has had in the last 10 years. Those thunder thighs don’t help, Hill.
Jenna Jameson the Incredible Shrinking Woman
Jenna Jameson has gotten really, really skinny of late. (Yes, I am well aware that there is even a better story about a botched surgery and Jenna’s vagina, but I’m not gonna touch that (the surgery or the vagina) with a 10-foot pole, so let’s move on, shall we?) Here’s Jenna Jameson doing something somewhere looking incredibly thin. You can practically see the loose skin hanging from her elbows. What has happened to Jenna Jameson? She used to be voluptuous, gorgeous, and now she’s just…thing. I mean, when you start looking like Calista Flockhart, it’s time to call in the nutritionist. Get help, Jenna!
Jenna Jameson Dumps Hubby for Tito Ortiz
Adult film babe Jenna Jameson and her huge plastic gazonkas have apparently gotten tired of having to constantly sleep with the same guy, so she’s filing for legal separation (i.e. divorce) from her fellow adult film star husband Jay Grdina to roll in the hay with UFC champ Tito Ortiz. Connoisseurs of adult films (i.e. porn) already know that Jameson has been trying to go “legit”, which started with marrying Jay and only doing Jay onscreen, not counting other women because, apparently, it’s okay to have sex with other women, just not other men because, you know, that would be wrong or sumthin’. Hey, it’s the porn industry, whaddaya want, common sense? So anyways, Jenna is back on the market — if you can get past Tito, that is.
Dave Navarro Trades Up Carmen Electra for Porn Poon
Despite being one of the fugliest rockers out there (doesn’t he play the drums or something?) Dave Navarro has landed two hot pieces of ass in a roll. First he was hitting Carmen Electra nightly for years, before dumping her for adult film star Jenna Jameson, who has also dumped her husband of a few years to knock boots with Navarro. Seriously, besides being rich and famous, there’s absolutely no reason why Navarro should be getting such Grade-A tail, which once again reminds me that I hate rockets — especially the ones that can’t even sing.
Jenna Jameson Has Something Hard in her Hands
You pervs out there (and you know who you are) probably won’t be surprised to hear that Jenna Jameson has yet again picked up something hard, but you may be surprised to learn that it’s not what you think, but rather a crystalline awards hardware from the Temptation Awards in L.A. And no, I don’t know what the hell the Temptation Awards are or what they’re giving awards out for, but I think L.A. is somewhere in Arizona. Or maybe Utah. My geography has never been sharper, so I’m sticking with Montana.
Jenna Jameson is a Dirty Girl
More of Jenna Jameson. She’s dirty, but she’s also incredibly hot, with a killer body (the inflated chest not withstanding) and a face that, though a bit rough, is still pretty smoking in the right light. And when I say “in the right light” I of course mean nekkid.
Jenna Jameson in Esquire Magazine
Jenna Jameson, the naughtiest of the naughty girls, gives mainstream modelling a try with this spread in Esquire Magazine. It’s quite tasteful, very sexy, and look, kids, she has her clothes on! Gasp! Horror! Wow!