The Random Page

Jennifer Love Hewitt Tweets Some Cleavage

Let’s face it, Twitter is practically useless unless you’re a vain douche bag who thinks everyone needs to know what you’re doing RIGHT THIS MINUTE. Of course, the exception is if you happen to be a celebrity like Jennifer Love Hewitt, and people actually do care what you do at any given time of the day. Plus, it allows celebs like, again, Jennifer Love Hewitt to do completely impulsive things like snap a very delightfully cleavage heavy pic like this and post it on the world wide web. Twitter, you my hero! And oh yes, Jennifer Love Hewitt’s puppies, too.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Shape Bikini Cover

The Ghost Whisperer on the cover of Shape’s October ’09 issue. We think that’s a bikini.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt Shows Off the Sex Appeal in Maxim

Wasn’t it just last year when everyone on the net were making fun of Jennifer Love Hewitt and her, er, generous behind? Well that was last year, and this year Jennifer Love Hewitt is back to fighting shape. And of course by ‘fighting shape’ I mean she’s hot again, and the only reason people will be talking about Jennifer Love Hewitt’s body is to go, “Holy shit, look at Jennifer Love Hewitt, she’s friggin’ hot!” Here she is in the latest issue of Maxim Magazine showing off what made us all fall in lust with her in the first place. And no, it’s not the goofy laugh. Yes, it is the hot bod and the generous rack.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt is Back on the Market!

Speaking of Hollywood hook-ups (weren’t we just?), after Alyssa Milano is announced to having been taken off the market, it appears the Gods are smiling on us and given us a replacement — word from Lalaland is that Jennifer Love Hewitt is back on the market, boys! That’s right, so polish up those pick-up lines for those dark bars where you will “accidentally” bump into Jennifer Love Hewitt and lay one on her. If you’re lucky she’ll still be on the rebound from her called off engagement to some Scottish dude she’s been dating for two years and was supposed to have gotten hitched with. And you know what they say about hot chicks on the rebound… And hey, failing that, remember our back-up plan: fake the mugging and come to her rescue. Chicks love a knight in shining armor, even if he’s ugly, overweight, and still lives with his mom. Below, reasons to pay Bud and Ed for their services.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt Bikini Pictures are Not so Hot

Here are some fresh bikini pictures of Jennifer Love Hewitt that are — wow, that are not so hot. I’ve always thought that Jennifer Love Hewitt has some of the worst fashion sense I’ve ever seen, and this is coming from a guy who owns only two sets of clothes — jeans and T-shirts. But more often than not, I’ll see Jennifer Love Hewitt out on talk shows wearing some of the most ghastly wardrobe. But dude, I think I’d prefer Jennifer in some fugly dress instead of these bikini pictures. I don’t wanna say that Jennifer Love Hewitt is not looking her best here, but let’s just say that TV has not done her any favors. The gut, the big ass — Holy. Not good. Not good at all. I am so disillusioned right now…

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Jennifer Love Hewitt Appreciation Post

One of these days Americans will wise up and give Jennifer Love Hewitt her due, at which point she’ll be made a National Treasure and all the world will rejoice. Well, the parts of the world that has TV and likes shows like “Ghost Whisperer”, anyway, because unless you’ve seen the TV series, you’ve probably never seen Jennifer Love Hewitt before, and in which case I guess you wouldn’t care if she was made a national treasure of any country or whatnot. Um, okay, now that I’ve rambled on long enough, here’s some Jennifer Love Hewitt to get you excited about my turning her into a national treasure plan. Jennifer Love Hewitt: Hot as hell, except when you let her dress herself, in which case it’s an epic disaster.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt Gets Sued

Now who would sue Jennifer Love Hewitt’s cleavage — er, I mean, who would sue Jennifer Love Hewitt? How could anyone have the nerve to take this lovely, nice young woman to court? Apparently the culprits are Jennifer’s former management, who are suing her for breach of contract based on an “oral agreement” that she pay them 10% of everything she earns. Ouch. And I thought Uncle Sam trying to squeeze the last $100 bucks I owe him for taxes was a disgrace. And how much are these dastardly bastiches want from our Jennifer? At least $350,000, including court costs. The bastards!

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Jennifer Love Hewitt is the New Boobs of the 2008 Chrysler Sebring

“The Ghost Whisperer” star Jennifer Love Hewitt was recently named by Chrysler as their pitchwoman for their upcoming 2008 Chrysler Sebring, but at a recent Sebring event, JLH showed up wearing a black sweater and pants, and that’s just a crying shame. So in hopes of helping Jennifer sell more Chrysler, here are some pictures of her 1999 pictorial in Maxim Magazine. Yeah, I’d buy that.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt + Bras and Panties = Heaven

It’s hard work being the new face of Hanes underwear. Just as “The Ghost Whisperer’s” Jennifer Love Hewitt. You have to spend most of your time in, well, your undewear as people snap pictures of her. Thank God someone is willing to do it. And when you’re Jennifer Love Hewitt and you have a rockin’ body, a killer rack, and one of those girl-next-door faces, you’ll bound to sell a lot of undewear. To guys, who are of course buying them for their girls. Mostly. Well, probably. Um.

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Jennifer Love Hewitt in Calabasas

I don’t know what Calabasas magazine does, or what “Calabasas” means (although my extensive education seems to indicate that it’s some kind of food, with beans, rice, and a touch of radish), but Jennifer Love Hewitt is on the cover and inside its pages, and she’s looking smokin’ in it. And best of all? It doesn’t look like Jennifer got to pick out her own wardrobe, because let’s admit it, the girl is cute as a button and twice as sexy, but I’ll be damn if her fashion sense reeks. Mind you, not that it matters, because as we all know, hotness trumps bad taste in clothes.

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