The Random Stuff of Interests Page

The Absurdity of the Cruise-Holmes Marriage

Okay, so we all knew that Tom Cruise was a tiny little dude, even if he seemed larger than life in all of his movies (ah, the magic of Hollywood), but seriously, who thought he was THIS small? Check out these great images of Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise out somewhere doing something (something no doubt very important, as Tom is wont to do), and looking totally, er, mismatched. Katie looks like Tom’s mom towering over her little baby boy, and Cruise looks so — what’s the word? Oh right, TINY. Check out the look on Katie Holmes’ face. I can hear her thoughts now: “As soon as he takes his hand away, just start running for the door…”

Maggie Gyllenhaal is the New Rachel Dawes in “The Dark Knight”?

Crap. I was kinda happy when Katie Holmes got bamboozled from the role of Rachel Dawes in the upcoming Christopher Nolan “Batman Begins” sequel, aka “The Dark Knight”, but man, now there’s news that Maggie Gyllenhaal has been cast in the role vacated by Holmes. Ugh. I have nothing against Gyllenhaal, except that I find her incredibly creepy and, well, she’s just friggin creepy, okay? This girl belongs in B-horror movies playing the crazy old lady in the rickety house, not in a superhero movie opposite Batman. But anyways, this is one time I hope the casting news is wrong, but the guys reporting it sure has their finger on the pulse, and it’s probably true. Still — Yuck. Is it too late to get Katie Holmes back? Guys? Anyone?

Emily Blunt to Replace Katie Holmes in “The Dark Knight”?

According to Cinema Blend, the Powers That Be at Warner Brothers are very keen to have British lass Emily Blunt (”Gideon’s Daughter”) step into the high heels left behind when Katie Holmes “left” (*cough*was fired*cough*) the “The Dark Knight”, which, according to reports, is already shooting in Chicago under an assumed name or some silly thing like that. Blunt would play the same role that Holmes played, that of crusading Gotham City Assistant District Attorney Rachel Dawes. This is, of course, just rumor, and probably nothing will come off it. Probably. But you know, if this is true, I’m pretty sure Gary Oldman is going to be the only American actor left in the entire cast. Take that for what you will.

Katie Holmes Pulls a Tom Cruise vis-a-vis the “Batman Begins” Sequel

A while ago reports surfaced that the Powers That Be behind the upcoming Christopher Nolan-helmed “Batman Begins” sequel (aka “The Dark Knight”) had decided to dump Katie Holmes while still retaining her character from the original movie, and that a replacement was being looked for. Now Katie Holmes, perhaps getting the same advice that hubby Tom Cruise got when Paramount ditched him, claims she “turned down an offer to reprise the role of assistant district attorney Rachel Dawes”. Obviously this is politics and a face-saving measure. I highly doubt that Holmes “turned down” a chance to star in a guaranteed blockbuster (and thus hyping her own movie career) because of unresolved contract negotiations, just as no one believes Tom Cruise when he said he parted ways with Paramount on his own accord.

Is Katie Holmes Out of “Batman Begins: The Dark Knight”?

Let’s admit it: The only people in this whole wide world who thought Katie Holmes wasn’t totally awful in “Batman Begins” was Katie Holmes, fans of Katie Holmes, or has last names that are Holmes or Cruise. Well guess what, Katie Holmes-in-Batman-Begins-haters, you just might get some relief, because here’s news that Holmes will not be in the “Batman Begins” sequel, titled “The Dark Knight”. According to Latino Review, Holmes’ character, Rachel Dawes, returns in the sequel, but Holmes has been dropped, and a search is now on for her replacement! Oh my oh my oh my. Methinks Tom Cruise’s Oprah couch hopping had something to do with it, don’t you?

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Wedding Picture

For those of you who are dying to see the wedding picture of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, here’s the official one that got sent out to all the magazines and press and whatnot. Word is that if the two ends up in splitsville (i.e. if Tom finally comes out of the closet and shacks up with his personal trainer, Rob), then Katie will get $30-plus million in compensation. I think they got married in Scotland or Ireland or Alaska somewhere over the weekend.

Bad News, Bat Fans: Katie Holmes Returns for “Batman Begins” Sequel

Katie Holmes is a cutie and a half, and I think she’s quite the lovely young lady, all nice and sugary (aside from her apparent lack of decision making skills — marriage to Tom Cruise, anyone?), but man, did she stink up “Batman Begins” or what? This girl should be relegated to cutesy romantic comedies, not knocking out bad guys side by side with the friggin Dark Knight. Which makes news that Katie Holmes has begun training (yoga and kickboxing!) for a January 2007 production start date for the “Batman Begins” sequel absolutely terrifying. And here I was hoping Heath Ledger, as the new Joker, would kill her off in the first 10 minutes so Bats can go even more batsy and get all moody and junk. Bleh.

Katie Holmes Signs Prenup, Gets $50 Mil for Divorce

So word is that Katie Holmes had to sign a prenup when she and Tom Cruise got married (after the baby was born, because that’s how Hollywood folks roll), and if the two should get divorce, she’ll pocket a cool $50 million. Not a bad chump of change for marrying a closeted gay dude. So here’s Katie Holmes’ first public appearance, at the “Mission Impossible 3″ premiere, of course, after delivering Tom’s alien love child. I tried to get as many pictures of Katie by herself as possible, but as you can see, Cruise sticks to her like white on rice. What, is he afraid she’ll get wise and run away or something? Hmm… Anyways, I still find it kind of creepy that she ended up marrying the guy she had a crush on when she was a teen. Don’t you?

A Katie Holmes Retrospective

Now that Katie Holmes is about ready to squeeze out a Tom Cruise Jr. (who wants to take odds this thing is gonna have three eyes and be able to fly?), and we assume cast her lot into the Cruise Nuthouse for all of eternity and beyond, here’s a brief retrospective of the hot Miss Katie Holmes, and what could have been. Oh, Katie, why didn’t you run away when you had the chance? Remember when Tom was jumping on that couch? That was the perfect time to flee, girl! Dang it, now we’ll never have you back. Sigh.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Sues Life&Style

I guess Tom Cruise doesn’t like people saying that he’s splitting with his faux wife Katie Holmes, so now he’s suing Life & Style Magazine, who broke that the story in the first place. Mind you, not that Life & Style is backing down.

They said this recently:

Is it Splitsville for Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise?

Is it true? Is it splitsville for Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise? Do you care? Read on!

According to “Life&Style Weekly”, the twosome are over. Done. Dead Stick a fork in ‘em.

Pregnant Katie Holmes Out Getting Coffee

Say what you will about her, but young Katie Holmes, recently preggered with the lovechild of Tom Cruise, still looks pretty damn good. Check her out here getting coffee and throwing on some fashionable attire to do it. I hope she’s drinking decaf!

Katie Holmes in Giant Magazine 2005

Some seductive poses from the formerly Tomboyish Ms. Katie Holmes. Dawson’s Creek what?

Katie Holmes is Ready for Tom Cruise

Katie Holmes has come a long way from her “Dawson’s Creek” tomboy character, but let’s hope someone saves the poor girl from that cult — er, I mean, Scientology — before it’s too late. Let her go, Tom! Damn you!

Katie Holmes has a Nice Tummy

Katie Holmes, aka Mrs. Tom Cruise, showing a nice figure, as well as a peek at those nice abs. Show us more, Katie!