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Megan Fox is Single. Call Me!

7 July 2008

So apparently Megan Fox has been engaged to, and has been dating Brian Austin Green (yes, the guy from Beverly Hills 90210, the white suburban guy who wanted to be a rapper, the epitome of the ’90s wigger) for the last four years. Well that was then, this is now. According to tabloid-y sources, one of the hottest girls on the planet has called off the engagement, claiming she’s too young (she’s 22 — which means BAG was hitting that when she was 18 — my man!) to be marrying some dude whose career has him headed back to TV while hers, on the other hand, has a thriving movie career that may or may not be because of her uber hot body and puffy lips. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Megan Fox’s career is exploding because she’s very talented. (And very, very, VERY hot.)

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Megan Fox at the 2008 MTV Movie Awards

2 June 2008

There was few reasons for anyone older than 13 years old to watch last night’s MTV Movie Awards — one of them was Megan Fox. The Transformers star is a nearly flawless creature, and is probably the hottest girl with ugly tattoos since the invention of hot girls and ugly tattoos. Really, the ink the girl has on her body needs to go. In particular that just Godawful looking Marilyn Monroe face on her arm. Good God, what was she, drunk out of her mind when she decided to slap that atrocity onto her arm? And those quotes all over her body. Holy Mother of all that’s Frak. Anyways, you still can’t deny that ugly tattoos notwithstanding, Megan Fox is still bloody hot. (Oh, and one last thing: I wish she’d lay off whatever it is that she slaps on her lips to make them puffy and shine like that. Repeat after me, Megan: Less is more.)

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Megan Fox is 2008’s Sexiest Woman in the World

23 April 2008

I know what you’re thinking: “Gee, I wonder who is the sexiest woman of 2008?” Well since you asked so nicely, the guys at FHM went and did a poll, and the winner is Megan Fox. See? And people say I don’t provide anything worthwhile on the site that you could use in, like, daily work conversations or what have you. So if Fox is first, who are the rest of the sexiest best? Jessica Biel came in at #2, followed by last year’s winner, Jessica Alba. Elisha Cuthbert and Scarlett Johansson brings up the rear at #4 and #5, respectively.

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Megan Fox in Allure Magazine

27 February 2008

Oh sure, who didn’t think giant f–king robots transforming and shooting rockets out of their tail pipes weren’t cool in “Transformers”? To add to all that geek coolness, you had a sexy as hell Megan Fox leaning over a car engine in a tight top that showed off her midriff. God bless Michael Bay. He knew what we wanted, and he gave it to us in spades — giant f–king robots and Megan Fox looking all hot and what have you. So is there any doubt I’m eagerly anticipating “Transformers 2″? Megan Fox better be in it, that’s all I’m saying. Here’s the Foxy lady herself in Allure magazine.

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Megan Fox Likes it Hard and Long

14 December 2007

In this week’s Totally Unnecessary Phallic Symbol of the Day, Megan Fox likes it very hard and very long. I’m talking about the glass thingamagig they give to winners of the Annual Hollywood Life Breakthrough Awards, of course. (What did you think I mean? Hush your dirty mind!) And no, I don’t know what the Annual Hollywood Life Breakthrough Awards is, and I don’t really want to know. It’s probably for something lame because if the Oscars or Golden Globes are lame, how unlame can something called the “Annual Hollywood Life Breakthrough” not be? My point exactly. Now watch Megan Fox get her hand on something hard and long and let’s call it a day.

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Megan Fox at Spike TV’s Scream 2007 Awards

24 October 2007

You gotta wonder if anyone stopped Megan Fox when she was about to put that ghastly tattoo of Marilyn Monroe on her arm and say to her, “Megan, check it out, doll, I know you’re rebellious and you’re noncomformist and all that junk, but seriously, a gigantic picture of Marilyn Monroe’s head on your arm? No, girl, no!” But apparently no one told her that, because everytime you see Megan Fox, she still has that Godawful looking black blotch on her arm. Sigh. Anyways, ugly tattoo or not, that won’t stop us from appreciating the fineness that is Megan Fox, and yes, she is quite fine. Here’s our foxy girl at Spike TV’s Scream 2007 Awards. I have no idea what that is, so don’t ask.

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Picture of the Day: Megan Fox

19 September 2007

Transformers star Megan Fox is such a fox (har har, I bet you saw that coming, right?) that any picture of her could qualify as a “Picture of the Day” entry. But this picture in particular took my breath away. I don’t know if it’s the couch, the lingerie, or the pose — or maybe it’s all those things added together for one hot looking picture. Or maybe it’s just the woman herself, and she could be covered in mud and it would still qualify as a Picture of the Day. Take a look at Megan Fox at her finest and tell me you aren’t having all kinds of dirty thoughts. Spread em, baby, spread em…

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Megan Fox in Arena Magazine

22 August 2007

The only thing keeping Megan Fox from being the perfect woman, in my opinion, is all those unGodly stupid tattoo quotes she’s got stenciled all across her body. I mean, what is the deal with that? Maybe Megan Fox is going the way of Angelina Jolie, and sporting tattoos everywhere has never hurt Angelina Jolie’s sex appeal. Then again, isn’t a girl who is willing to ruin her skin with ink even sexier? I’ll leave that up to you to decide, not-so-dear readers. Here’s Megan Fox in a recent spread for Arena Magazine. Not as risque as Arena’s usual stuff, but eh, beggars can’t be choosers.

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Megan Fox and Rachael Taylor Shills for Transformers in Sydney

12 June 2007

Paramount has been working poor Megan Fox a whole lot, since the last time I looked up she was in Korea promoting “Transformers”. Today she’s in Sydney, Australia for the movie’s premiere along with co-star (and local girl) Rachael Taylor. And oh yeah, Michael Bay was there, too, but nevermind that. Also at the premiere was lovely Megan Fox’s tattoos, including a quite ugly (from what I can gather) Marilyn Monroe tattoo on her inner arm. Oh, Megan, why? I can dig the quote tattoos, but why such an ugly tattoo on the inner arm? Anyways, we Americans will have to wait for “Transformers” to open July 3rd (or maybe 4th, I forgot, they keep changing the date).

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Megan Fox in GQ Magazine

6 June 2007

Did I mention that Megan Fox is one hot tomato? (Or maybe I should use potato? Hey, potato, tomato, right?) Either way, “Transformers” star Megan Fox is one hot mama. Here she is in the latest issue of GQ Magazine. Go to the newsstand and grab a copy now. Wait, do they still have newsstands around? I don’t know, the last time I went to buy something from a newsstand it was covered in a brown bag, if you know what I mean, and I think you do. Wink wink, hint hint, etc.

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Megan Fox and her Tattoo at the MTV Movie Awards

4 June 2007

We all know Megan Fox is a bad, bad girl. Fortunately for us all, she’s a hot, hot bad girl. Here’s Megan, star of the upcoming “Transformers” (which, incidentally, won an award, even though it hasn’t even come out yet — yeah, the MTV Movie Awards take itself that not seriously), arriving at the MTV Movie Awards and showing off her tattoo. She seems to have a thing for Shakespeare quotes, and the one behind her right shoulder reads: “We will all laugh at gilded butterflies”, which is, in case you didn’t know, from Shakespeare’s play King Lear. She also has another tattoo quote under her left arm along her side (geez, doesn’t that hurt?), but I can’t read it. Can you?

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Video: Megan Fox Transformers Killer 3 Commercial

27 May 2007

Megan Fox isn’t just one of the stars of Michael Bay’s upcoming “Transformers”, she’s also one of its hottest pitchwoman. And I do mean hot, but then again, you’ve probably already figured out my obsession with Megan Fox. Check out Meggie’s commercial for the Pontiac below. And yes, she likes to be called Meggie. She told me so. (Now if only I can get that restraining order lifted in time to stalk — er, I mean, visit her again…)

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Final TRANSFORMERS Posters and Standee

18 April 2007

Via ComingSoon, here are some new “Transformers” posters and theater standees (you know, those big posters you see standing in the theater lobbies?) that you may or may not have seen before recently sent out by Paramount Pictures. DreamWorks Pictures has released the final psoters and a photo of a new standee for director Michael Bay’s Transformers, opening in theaters on July 4. The sci-fi action-adventure stars Shia LaBeouf, Tyrese Gibson, Josh Duhamel, Anthony Anderson, Rachael Taylor, Megan Fox, John Turturro and Jon Voight.

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Megan Fox in “Transformers” Images

15 March 2007

Not a whole lot, just a couple of images of the lovely Megan Fox in the upcoming geek extravaganza known as “Transformers”, set to light the world of geekdom on fire come Summer. The Earth is caught in the middle of an intergalactic war between two races of robots, the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons, which are able to change into a variety of objects, including cars, trucks, planes and other technological creations. “Transformers”, directed by Michael Bay, opens July 4th, 2007.

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Megan Fox back in FHM

2 February 2007

Look, kids, it’s Megan Fox back in FHM magazine! If you don’t know who Megan Fox is, you will when “Transformers” hits the streets this Summer. This gorgeous woman with her incredible eyes will be turning fanboys into dripping wet fanboys the first time she flashes those gorgeous eyes on the big screen. But before you get to see her projected in giant size, here she is looking just as good in FHM magazine. The only crimp in Megan’s otherwise’s flawless plan to tantalize and then rule the world of fanboys? Those tattoos. Those tattoos on her side, of all places. What is the deal with the tattoos, girls! Stop the with the crazy tattoos already!

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Megan Fox Really Likes Her Boyfriend. I mean, REALLY.

25 May 2006

Gorgeous actress Megan Fox (from “Hope and Faith” and the upcoming “Transformers” live-action movie) really likes her boyfriend Brian Austin Green (of “Beverly Hills 90210″ fame). In fact, she likes Green so much, while they were out and about she took the time to massage his, er, package under the table. Apparently Megan doesn’t know what “telephoto lens” means. Check out the look on Green’s face. If she’s this loose on the streets, can you imagine how she is in private? Goddamn that’s one lucky bastard.

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Megan Fox Out and About

10 March 2006

Megan Fox is out and about doing things young Hollywood starlets do, and looking gorgeous doing it. Normally we just notice Megan’s gorgeous eyes, but as you can see, she has a rockin’ body, too. It’s almost not fair. The girl has it all, including super powers. Yes, you I’m breaking an exclusive here. Tell your friends: Megan Fox actually has superpowers. What powers does she possess, you ask? Why, to make men stand up and hold books in front of their pants, of course. (Yeah, saw that one coming, didncha…?)

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Megan Fox Strikes Again

15 February 2006

Can’t…look…away… Megan Fox…too…beautiful… eyes…hypnotizing… killer…bod… ooooooooooooh… Um, where was I? Right. This is Megan Fox, an actress with some incredle eyes. And oh yeah, the rest of her ain’t bad, either. I think she’s on tV or sumthin’.

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