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Criss Angel vs. Jim Callahan — WHO YA GOT??

2 November 2007

Dude, Criss Angel rocks! So here’s the deal: Criss Angel is one of the judges on an NBC show called Phenomenon, where they have a bunch of magicians, physics, what have you on the show, and at the end of the season, one of them wins and gets some money or something. (Um, I’m really not sure, but that’s probably what happens.) But in any case, on last night’s live taping of Phenomenon, they had on a “psychic” name Jim Callahan, who does one of those “talk to the dead” gags. Anyways, Callahan goes through his 10-minute long routine of summoning spirits. I really have no idea what he did, I skipped through most of it because, come on, it’s just embarassingly fake what he’s doing. After the end of Callahan’s gag, Criss Angel challenges Callahan to tell him what he (Angel) has in an envelope that he’s holding up, and if Callahan guesses right, Angel will give him $1 million dollars. Instead of claiming that $1 million using his super psychic powers, Callahan instead pretends like he’s offended and tries to fight with Angel! It is, bar none, the funniest (and dumbest) thing I’ve ever seen on TV. Check it out.

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Dog Chapman Caught Using N-Word to Son

1 November 2007

Dude, come on, the guy still has a mullet, for God’s sake, of course he thinks throwing around n*gger is a-okay. We’re talking about Duane “Dog” Chapman, who has his own A&E Reality TV show where he and his family of bounty hunters run around Hawaii “capturing” dangerous criminals like the fat girl who jumped bail, or the fat trucker who jumped bail — you get the idea. Basically it’s Chapman and company running around acting like the world is going to end if they don’t catch some poor slob who decided to jump bail. But catching them is now the least of Chapman’s problems, especially after a recorded conversation between Chapman and his son Tucker in which Chapman shows his racist side by referring to Tucker’s black girlfriend Monique Shinnery using the N-word at least 50 times throughout the phone conversation has surfaced and — oops! — fallen into the hands of the National Enquirer.

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Jack Bauer is Back! 24 Season 7 Trailer

26 October 2007

Har har, so a bunch of Washington scumbags (one of them played by the dad from That 70s Show!) has Jack Bauer in Washington D.C. to testify against himself or something idiotic like that (when does the people in Washington do anything that wasn’t idiotic?), when an “old friend” shows up to try to crash some airplanes. Yes, it’s Tony Almeida! Now Jack has to go after Tony with the help of a hot FBI agent, and no doubt a bunch of conspiracy angles will show up. It’s good ol’ 24 fun like you expect, except this time Jack Bauer won’t have CTU to help him out! Bummer. But hey, it’s Jack — he can kick terrorist ass alone with one arm tied behind his back.

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Must-See TV: NBC’s Bionic Woman

19 October 2007

bionic-woman-tv-series.jpgI am really digging NBC’s remake of The Bionic Woman. Or, actually, just Bionic Woman, minus the “The” part. I don’t know why, that’s just what the show goes by. Lame, I know, but what’s not lame is the show itself. Michelle Ryan stars as a bartender with no career path who gets side-swipe one day by a woman who just happens to be the former Bionic Woman. Ryan ends up being the next incarnation of the Bionic Woman, and gets to do cool things like beat the crap out of people. The pilot’s best scene features a dual between the former and present bionic woman in the rain. It’s cool stuff. The show is just as cool, and Michelle Ryan, though she didn’t really grow on me in the beginning, is starting to. Of course the fact that she’s hot doesn’t hurt. Great show. I would recommend you give it a shot if you haven’t yet. It could very well be the next Alias.

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Jorja Fox Quits CSI, Says Goodbye to Creepy TV Romance

16 October 2007

Apparently tired of having her sweet young thing character roped into creepy romance with her 70-year old co-star (I think he’s 70, or is it more like 60?), actress Jorja Fox has called it quits and is leaving the original CSI TV show. Says Fox about her decision to leave: “There are all these things I want to do. Some are personal. Some are professional. And I really need to do some of them before I get too old.” You know, like not having to fake chemistry with an old guy on a TV show. I know how she feels. The last time I had to fake chemistry with an old guy, it wasn’t pleasant. But perhaps I’ve said too much. Fox will appear on the show for five episodes this season, and then it’s see ya.

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Must-See TV: NBC’s Life

15 October 2007

“A former police officer returns to the force after having been wrongly imprisoned for years.” Trust me, the actual show is a hell of a lot better than that brief, one-line synopsis of NBC’s show Life. I don’t know how Life is doing in the ratings, but I’m telling you this — you MUST watch this show. It’s probably the best new thing on TV right now. It stars Damian Lewis and Sarah Shahi as mismatched partners solving crimes in L.A. Lewis plays Charlie Crews, the cop who was wrongly convicted, and is now out and about, determined to solve his own frame-up. Only he tells people he doesn’t care to solve it, but in fact he’s obsessed with it. Basically, it’s a damn good show, and you need to start watching it on Wednesdays at 10/9c on NBC.

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The Girls of Supernatural Season 3: Katie Cassidy and Lauren Cohan

12 October 2007

Just as the guys at Smallville got smart and added a super hot blonde to the show as Supergirl, the guys over at Supernatural also got smart and added two babes to their show’s Season 3: Katie Cassidy and Lauren Cohan. Now I don’t know if the producers of these shows are doing this on their own, or if the CW are demanding that they sex up their respective shows, but whoever got this ball rolling, I say, “Thanks!” We’ve already seen Katie Cassidy, a demon demon-killer (no, that wasn’t a typo) on Supernatural, but Lauren Cohan has yet to show up. But based on the previews we’ve seen of next week’s episode, it should be a nice intro to her badass character. That’s another thing: Not only are all these new injections of blood babelicious, but they’re all ass-kickers! Coincidence?

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Carly Pope Joins 24’s Season 7

9 October 2007

The upcoming seventh season of FOX’s aging action-adventure show 24 keeps on rolling, this time announcing that Canadian actress Carly Pope has join the cast as the girlfriend of the show’s female President’s son, who apparently has gone missing. I’m guessing the dude just went for a ride or something, or maybe got mugged when he went to the “cities” for some grass. But I could be wrong. The first time I noticed Carly Pope was for a movie called “Nemesis Game” with that guy from Highlander. It was okay, but man, Carly Pope sure was purty in it. Besides that movie, she’s guest-starred on Tru Calling, Dirt, and a ton of Canadian movies and TV shows I’ve never seen. Check her out in 24 coming soon.

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Jon Stewart and Chris Matthews Throwdown

9 October 2007

So I’ve been hearing about this throwdown between Jon Stewart and Chris Matthews on the Daily Show forever this morning, and finally found the clip of it. The confrontation only lasts for a minute or so, and the rest is a lot of talking about what happened. Basically, Matthews went on The Daily Show to hawk his book and expected to find a friendly audience, but instead Stewart lit into him. It’s great stuff, and you sort of feel sorry for Matthews after a while. Well, sort of, if he wasn’t such an overbearing douche bag, that is. The best line? Matthews asks Stewart to come on his show, and Stewart replies with a straight face: “I don’t troll.” Oh…my…GOD.

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Ever Carradine is Ever Ready for 24

6 October 2007

Actress Ever Carradine, besides being the niece of of former Kung Fu star David Carradine, has joined the seventh season of FOX’s action-adventure show 24. Besides being one of those children who could only be named by people who are “in the business” (seriously, who names their kid “Ever”?), David Carradine’s niece is quite the hottie. In the show, Ever will play a FBI agent who, in all likelihood, will get in Jack Bauer’s way until she’s killed off by terrorist or the like. Basically, if you’re a girl and you end up crossing Jack Bauer’s path, you ain’t gonna last long. Just ask — well, everyone on the show not named Kim Bauer. Production on the seventh season began last month, though people are still wondering what will happen if star Kiefer Sutherland gets thrown in the slammer for his DUI.

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Grey’s Anatomy’s New McHottie Lauren Stamile

6 October 2007

For someone who is about to blow up on the ABC show Grey’s Anatomy as, possibly, a new love interest for Patrick Dempsey’s character, aka Dr. McDreamy to you girls (and, um, some guys) out there, there sure isn’t a whole lot of Lauren Stamile out there. But I did find a couple on IMDB.com, plus this show reel of her on YouTube. Wait, I’m getting way too ahead of myself. Lauren Stamile is a new cast member on the popular show Grey’s Anatomy’s current season. No one is saying what character she’ll play, or who she’ll end up boinking with in the hospital stairways, but never you mind that. After guest starring in a ton of TV shows, it must be nice to finally land a major breakthrough role. Oh, Hollywood really IS a land of dreams!

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Brit Babe Invasion: The TV Edition

4 October 2007

The British are coming! The British are coming! Well, the British women, anyway. (Okay, there are some men, too, but we don’t really care for them all that much here. It’s British women or bust, baby!) If you’ve turned on the TV recently, you’ll notice that British babes are all over the place, some fronting new shows, and others co-starring in them. Leading the pack is Michelle Ryan, who came from EastEnders to star in NBC’s Bionic Woman, followed by Anna Friel (ex-Brookside) in ABC’s Pushing Daisies, and then there are Sophia Myles and Lena Headey from Moonlight and The Sarah Connor Chronicles, respectively. And let’s not forget Parminder Nagra, who is in her, what, 50th season of ER? For a full list of British Babes invading American shores, check out here. For now, let’s get to the pictures.

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Josie Maran Eliminated from Dancing with the Stars

28 September 2007

You know, this is kind of old news. Okay, it’s REALLY old news. As in, it happened on Wednesday, which is, like, nearly a decade ago or sumthin’. But anyways, I’m kind of bummed that gorgeous Josie Maran got dumped (i.e. eliminated) from the show Dancing with the Stars on Wednesday. I still don’t know what you actually win by winning that stupid show, but it just got dumber by eliminating Josie Maran. That basically means half of the male audience will leave with her. Or at least that’s my theory. I’ve been known to be wrong before, but not often. Head on below to see Josie’s first and only dance on the show. Screw’em if they can’t hold onto a hot woman.

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New TV Show Preview: Moonlight

27 September 2007

Here’s the premise of the new show Moonlight: A vampire lands work as a private investigator and falls for a mortal woman. Okay, so he “lands work” as a PI? What does that mean? He’s a vampire, so I’m guessing he’s been around a long time, and he has to go around “landing” work? Can’t he do something more dignified? Anyways, I’m also guessing that the “mortal woman” he falls for is the lovely Sophia Myles, who has just been cast on the show to replace another girl whose name I don’t recall. The show stars Alex O’Loughlin as the vampire PI, Shannyn Sossamon as a sexy vampire (is there any other kind?), and Brian White as the token black guy. It looks like it has promise, but I dunno — a vampire who is also a private investigator? Didn’t they already do a show about that called Angel?

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Witness the Damnation that is Kid Nation…

21 September 2007

What kind of bad parent do you have to be to agree to hand your kids over to a TV network so they can be tossed into an old ghost town to fend for themselves? Well that’s the premise of CBS’ controversial and Godawful Kid Nation, a show where 40 children, with the oldest being 15 (and the youngest barely 8) are sent to a dead Western ghost town that has failed so they can rebuild it. The object, it appears, is to see if they can survive and fend for themselves, or maybe show up the adults because, let’s face it, kids nowadays thinks they can do anything and know everything, so why not toss them into an old ghost town and tell them to make it work? Is this show the worst thing on TV? Maybe. Are the parents who gave their kids to this show the worst parents EVER? Absolutely-frakkin’-lutely.

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CHA-CHING! Lauren Graham Inks TV Deal

19 September 2007

It would appear that the NBC Network has won the Lauren Graham lottery, inking the former Gilmore Girls star to a development deal with the network for a cool 7-figure deal, which Variety says is one of the richest of the year. (Can you say, CHA-CHING?) Now the trick will be to get Lauren Graham with some writers and producers and hatch a show that will be just as big a hit as Gilmore Girls, which, I hate to say it, the odds are against. Let’s face it, you can count only one person out of the Seinfeld cast that managed a hit show post-Seinfeld, and it ain’t Kramer. I wish Lauren Graham luck; she seems like a genuinely great person, and it would be nice to see her on TV again, preferably on something not so, well, chick-heavy.

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Mary Kate Olsen in Weeds Promos

18 September 2007

Mary Kate Olsen is trying to shed her girly image by guest starring on an episode of Showtime’s Weeds, a show about a suburban housewife played by Mary Louise Parker who sells weeds on the side. Or maybe she’s made a career out of it by now. I know that she show started with Parker selling on the side. Or maybe I was wrong from the very beginning. Eh, who cares. Anyways, tune in when Mary Kate Olsen sheds her good girl image for a little Mary Jane in the upcoming new season of Weeds. You’ll notice that sister Ashley is no where to be seen in these promos from the show. I guess Ash isn’t a fan of the J. The girl doesn’t know what she’s missing.

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Sally Fields’ Potty Mouth Gets Her Censored by Fox

18 September 2007

Knee-jerk Liberals around the world are all afluttered and falling over themselves to call FOX’s censoring of Sally Fields’ acceptance speech at Sunday’s Emmy Awards as part of a Vast Global Right Wing Conspiracy by the Evil Fox Network. Fear not, kids, the studio didn’t censor Fields because she mouthed off about the Iraq War (in fact, you can hear ALL her war comments in the “live” telecast), but in fact they censored her when she used the word “Goddamn”, which is a big no-no on American TV for some unGodly reason. (It’s stupid, I know, but it explains the censoring.) Here is what Fox censored and a version of the broadcast not censored. Judge for yourself.

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The Girls of Dexter Jennifer Carpenter, Julie Benz, and Jaime Murray

18 September 2007

If you haven’t been watching Showtime Channel’s original series Dexter, then you are missing out. It’s a killer show (literally) and it has a killer premise. Basically, it’s about a police crime scenes forensics guy who moonlights as a serial killer. But get this: he knows he’s a killer, but he ONLY KILLS BAD GUYS. Basically, he finds the evidence, finds out who did the killing, and then he kills the culprit. A serial killer of serial killers! And oh yeah, the girls on the show are hot. Check out some promos of Jennifer Carpenter, Julie Benz, and Jaime Murray, with the British beauty Murray joining the show’s latest season. Be there or be square. Or Dexter will come over and stick an ice pick in your ear.

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The Girls of Private Practice: Kate Walsh, Amy Brenneman, KaDee Strickland, Audra McDonald

17 September 2007

Now I’m not going to pretend and tell you that I’m psyche to see Private Practice, the Grey’s Anatomy spin-off TV show, but I will tell you this: Any show smart enough to give Amy Brenneman another regular spot on its set is pretty damn smart, because Amy Brenneman made even that awful Judging Amy good. And if Private Practice follows in the steamy, sex-on-the-stairwells plotting of Grey’s Anatomy, why wouldn’t you want to tune in to give all the lovely ladies of Private Practice a shot? Here are some promotional pictures from the show featuring those lovely ladies, including Kate Walsh, Amy Brenneman, KaDee Strickland, Audra McDonald. (And I hear the show has some guys on it, too, but who cares about them, right?)

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