The Random Stuff of Interests Page

It’s not enough that Scarlett Johansson has to be a super hot and super talented Hollywood actress desired by men everywhere and envied by women everywhere (and let’s not forget, coveted by she-males everywhere), but she has to do the occasional shilling for high-priced products like Louis Vuitton. Now I don’t know anything about Louis Vuitton, being a warm-blooded heterosexual male and whatnot. (Just go with it, okay?) I mean, come on, I love football, baseball, basketball, and I don’t get into purses and whatnot. At least, I’m assuming that Louis Vuitton is selling purses here. Um, here’s Scarlett Johansson shilling for some LV purses. My girlfriend (and by which I mean, the girl that doesn’t exist) would be so proud of me for making a post about purses.

Gorgeous R&B singer Rihanna has taken the time to grace the cover and pages of Maxim’s September issue. The German version, anyway. I don’t know why the US version didn’t have her on, too, but I guess the Germans just have better tastes. In any case, here’s Rihanna looking very good as per usual in Maxim. You know, it’s not easy to look good in a gold bikini, but Rihanna certainly pulled it off. Of course, being the hottie with a music career that she is, I’m sure she has plenty of gold (or bling, as the kids call it) at home, so she’s probably used to having gold on on a daily basis.

Let’s face it: unless you’re Leonardo DiCaprio or George Clooney, the chances of your weekend sucking out loud is pretty darn good. And since we here at the Random Page are nothing if not caring, we have made this post to send you off into the weekend with a big smile, and hopefully your crappy weekend won’t end up nearly as crappy as it would otherwise. Mind you, I’m not saying your weekend will blow, but come on, you’re not Brad Pitt, and there ain’t no Angelina Jolie waiting at the other end of that phone call. A big fat girl who you can get drunk is your best bet. So here’s some Imogen Thomas to carry you into the weekend. Good luck, boyos.

Kevin Smith is a funny dude. Sure, you might not like any of his movies, but in person, this is one funny dude. And vulgar, too. This video is SOOOO NSFW. So here’s Kevin Smith, at Comic Con (an annual geek event at San Diego), who is taking questions from the audience. This fat white kid with glasses goes up to the stand and dares to ask Smith if he’ll ever do anything original. Smith, of course, answers as if it was a good question, but then quickly rips on the guy’s mom. It goes on for two minutes. Smith is just ripping the guy a new one, and the lesson of the day is: “Never attack a dude with a microphone.” Sucka.

So it’s Titans spring training camp, and ex-Ohio State dork Donnie Nickey thinks the way to “play hard” in spring camp is to nearly break his wide receiver’s neck in a tackle. Mind you, this is JUST PRACTICE, and they’re ON THE SAME TEAM. So Vince Young gets in his grill and bitch slaps his dumb ass across the helmet and it’s ON. The whole thing is on ESPN, and this is actually where this video clip comes from. I’m a big fan of VY, and love the way he goes after the idiot. I mean, dude, you’re on the same team! Don’t try to break your teammate’s neck, you dumb meat locker!

As per the title, supermodel Estefania Luyk hails from Spain, or Madrid to be more precise. She’s also very, very pretty. Now I don’t know what the girl does in her spare time or what TV shows she enjoys, if any, but I’m willing to bet it would be sexy shows, because you know, she’s really, and as per supermodel rules, she’s only allowed to watch sexy shows and what not. But I digress. Here’s Estefania Luyk. She comes from Spain. Please to enjoy. (What, you want more? I’m tired of making up gibberish for you people! Stop being so demanding!)

You guys feel that? That’s the breeze of a new supermodel discovery. That’s right, kids, it’s been a while, but our Random Supermodel of the Day is Brazilian import (you sorta figured this part out, right?) Renata Maciel dos Santos, who hails from, um, Brazil. Or, to be more precise, Florianópolis, Santa Catarina, which I think is somewhere near Mexico City, or is that in Mexico? Um, okay, so my geography sucks, but there’s nothing wrong with my eyes, because Renata Maciel dos Santos is what they call HOT. Please to enjoy.

I’m not sure if Kate Middleton is still dating Prince Harry — or was it Prince William? I don’t keep track of these things, so there could be a third prince named Bill for all I know. Regardless, where was I going? Oh, right. I don’t know if Kate Middleton is still dating Prince Harry/William/Billy/Whoever, but if she’s now a single gal, then the boys should be lining up once these pictures of a very fine figured Kate Middleton hits the net. That’s a very nice looking girl there, boys, even from the backside. And I’m talking about the curves, the buttocks, the — well, just her. Kate, call me! I’m listed in the book! (Under weird guy who lives with mother in basement…)

It’s Friday, so you know what that means — yes, that’s right, kids, it’s hot chick with barely any clothes on day! Or as my girlfriend would call it, Victoria’s Secret Day. (And of course by “girlfriend” I mean that girl next door I’ve been look at through binoculars but she doesn’t know it. Heee heee.) Ahem. What I’m trying to say is, Gemma Atkinson looks really good in lingerie, and here are more proof. Now don’t you just love Fridays? Gemma Atkinson would work on any day of the week, but there’s just something about a woman in a lingerie name Gemma and Fridays. It just goes together like Paris Hilton and faux fame.

Is British babe Vikki Blows’s real name really Vikki Blows? I don’t know, and I don’t care, because when you look this good with very little clothes on, names just don’t seem to matter all that much. You might know Vikki as one of The Sun’s “Page 3″ girls, or if not, then she has also appeared in FHM Magazines Top 100 Sexiest Women list. Besides Page 3 and FHM, she’s done work for Zoo, Nuts and Bizarre. Now all she needs to do is make an appearance in Maxim, and she’ll have the perfect resume for a hot babe from England.

Wow, I can’t believe how gorgeous Claire Danes looks. She just keeps getting more and more gorgeous every time I see her at one of these publicity events. Who knew that the geeky girl from “My So Called Life” would grow up to be a tall young woman with a perfect body and strong cheekbones? In honor of Claire Danes’ continued growth as a Hollywood beauty, you should all run out and see her new movie “Stardust”. Or you can send me money and I’ll go see it over and over again. Deal? Great. Send your money to, imaschmuck@paypal.com. Did I mention that Claire Danes just keeps getting more gorgeous every time I see her? Beautiful.

People have told me that Jennifer Ellison is an actress, that she acts in plays, and movies, and TV, and whatnot, but I’ll be damn if everytime I see her, she doesn’t act like an actress. By which I mean, she’s always wearing as little clothes as possible, which makes me believe British doll Jennifer Ellison is more of a glamour model first and an actress second. Then again, the “people” who have told me these things are just voices in my head, so maybe I should stop listening to them. Um. Anyways, here’s Jennifer Ellison looking uber hot while sweaty. I like the chains motif. Very Hellraiser. Let’s hope Pinhead doesn’t get a hold of this, cause, you know, Pinhead don’t like people playing with his chains. Or yanking them. Ahem.

Has Australian actress Abbie Cornish landed the Bond Girl role in the upcoming Bond movie? Bond 44 or was it 55? Well, you know, the next one that’s coming up. Anyhoo. Maybe she has, and maybe she hasn’t. The fact is, everyone and their momma (and their daughter) has been named as the “new Bond girl”. Hell, even the Olsen twins have been bandied about as landing the role at one point. See what I mean? The latest name is Abbie Cornish, whose best bud Rose Byrne seems to have let the cat out of the bag when she told MTV, “I think Abbie Cornish’s got it.” Abbie is cute and all, but a Bond Girl? I can’t quite see it…

In case you haven’t heard, Heidi Klum and Marisa Miller are Victoria’s Secrets new “It” girls. Or at least, they’re wearing T-shirts that says they’re Victoria’s Secrets’ “It” girls. Very, very tight white T-shirts, I might add, but then you probably have that figured out. We’re talking about two smoking hot supermodels at the top of their game; of COURSE they’re going to be wearing clothes that are at least two sizes too small. Here are the two girls at a Victoria’s Secret booth (in a mall, one presumes) promoting the latest line of bras. Too bad they aren’t trying it on for the press. Wouldn’t THAT be fun? Yes, yes, it would be. And they look like they could be sisters, too. Ooooh, fantasy alert, boys! Fantasy material alert!

Wow, does Merry Miller actually speak English, or is she reading her teleprompter phonetically? I swear, I have never seen an anchorperson do such a poor job with an interview. Poor Holly Hunter. Here she is, an Academy Award winning actress, who has done some great works in her life, and all she’s trying to do is promote her new TV show “Saving Grace”, and she has to come face to face with this bumbling blonde who can’t even read the teleprompter without stumbling all over words like “Hello”, “Hi”, and, yup, ABC. Merry Miller actually MIS-IDENTIFIES HER OWN NETWORK at the end of the video segment! Truetruetrue, indeed!

Some random bits about Michelle Hunziker, seen her in a swimsuit at the beach, via Wikipedia: She’s a Swiss actress, model and a famous personality on Italian and German television. She was born in Sorengo (Lugano), in the southern, Italian speaking part of Switzerland. After having hosted the Swiss show Cinderella, Hunziker was discovered by German TV producers. In 2007, Michelle Hunziker co-hosted with Pippo Baudo the most popular Italian show, the Festival di Sanremo. And oh yeah, she looks really, really good in a bathing suit. Too bad it’s a full swimsuit. A bikini would have been so much better, and then I could have titled this post, “Michelle Hunziker Bikini Pictures”. Oh, what could have been…

Don’t you love a girl in her skivvies? I know I do, and I’m not even sure if “skivvies” is an actual word. I think it is, since I heard them use it on TV once, and when they can use it on TV, you know it has to be true. Am I right or am I right? In any case, here’s British actress Tina O’Brien, who is so smoking hot in her skivvies that she has just forced me to use a word I’m not sure is even a legitimate word about a half dozen times. Now that’s hot, baby! (Now where did I put my copy of Webster’s dictionary…)

Hey look, kids, it’s bikini pictures of Kristin Cavallari! And here I thought the former “Laguna Beach” hottie had been abducted by UFOs or something, since we have hardly heard from her lately. Then again, I’m sure it’s hard to compete for superfluous attention from the paparazzi when Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, and Lindsay Lohan are trying to kill Californians on the highways using their cars as weapons. And I suspect Kristin Cavallari, despite her rich girl pedigree, is not stupid enough to indulge in drugs and boozing, thus perhaps keeping her from doing something outrageous to attract the attention of the cameras. Good for her, I say. She still looks good, too.

In case you missed Katharine McPhee on Leno last night (or was it two nights ago? My math sucks so much), she was on and she performed, and it rocked the house. Here’s a picture of Katharine doing her thing. Tell me watching a girl practically doing down on a microphone stand isn’t sexy. Really, Katharine McPhee will end up being the most famous American Idol non-winner of them all. Heck, I’m willing to bet that in time, she’ll even surpass all the winners. Watch out, Kelly and that other girl and those guys, Katharine McPhee is a’comin’ for ya!

I must admit, the last time I saw a batch of Ashley Tisdale bikini pictures, I wasn’t all that impressed. I’m sorry, but I just expected more. (Is it too much for me to expect perfection in my female celebrities?) But I have to admit, these latest batch of Ashley Tisdale bikini pictures are quite fantastic. Maybe I was expecting too much that time, or Ashley wasn’t quite herself, but she sure has made up for it with these new batch. And let me just say, I’m sorry I doubted you, Ashley. You are SMOKING.