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Natalie Martinez in Death Race Promos
We’ve already chronicled the rise of Natalie Martinez, who will be co-starring in the upcoming “Death Race” movie remake from that mountain town called Hollywood. I have no idea if the movie will catch on, or if Natalie Martinez will be able to parlay that role into an actual movie career, but you gotta start somewhere, right? And if Jason Statham’s bald head doesn’t do it for you, Natalie Martinez’s tight abs should just about do it. I’m guessing that Natalie Martinez plays the female lead in the movie, but since this is a dude movie (i.e. cars, guns, prison sodomy, etc), a female lead is usually just the hottest chick in the movie who is actually a chick and not, you know, a dude with braces. Anyways, Natalie Martinez in “Death Race” promos.
August 5th, 2008 | The Guy Who Writes This Stuff | 0 comments | Read More
Miranda Kerr Bikini Pics in Ralph Magazine
When you’ve been on every runway in the world and has graced the pages of Sports Illustrated’s world famous swimsuit issue and Victoria’s Secrets skimpy-ish catalogs, isn’t showing up in a lad’s magazine like Ralph kind of taking a step backwards in one’s career? I don’t know, I really can’t figure the politics of lad’s magazines; that’s the kind of stuff for men greater than I. But what about Miranda Kerr’s latest bikini-clad appearance in a magazine? Oh yes, we’re definitely feeling the Aussie heat, and then some. The woman is fabulously hot, and I wouldn’t be surprised if she knocks off Marisa Miller for the SI Swimsuit Issue cover in 2009. She’s got the makings of something special, I’m telling you. Now if she’ll only return my phone calls…
Anna Torv in Fringe Promos
It’s funny, but despite having J.J. Abrams’ name attach to the project, I’m really not hearing all that much about FOX’s new X-Files-wannabe show, Fringe. The show stars Australian actress Anna Torv in her American debut, and I’m not sure if it’ll do very good business in terms of viewership. I’m just not hearing a whole lot of stuff about the show, or at least, not as much as I’m hearing about Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse, for instance. But hey, no one heard about Alias before it came on the air, either, and that went on for a pretty long time. Maybe it’ll happen to Fringe, too. Here are some promos from the show with its female lead, Anna Torv.
Giada De Laurentiis Cooks with Hotness
According to all the extensive research I’ve done on Giada De Laurentiis (and of course by “extensive research” I mean I went on Wikipedia and read her entry), the Italian American cooking Goddess is the host of a number of TV shows on the Food Network (which must be, what, like working in porn for a really, really horny kid?), including Everyday Italian, Behind the Bash, Giada’s Weekend Getaways, and Giada in Paradise. Now I don’t know if she actually hosts all of them at the same time, but if she did, wow, that’s pretty impressive. I can’t even tie my shoelaces and think about hot girls at the same time, and Giada can host four shows at once? Man, where do all these chicks get the energy, and where can I get me some? (Those comic book collection don’t alphabetically sort themselves, you know.)
Teresa Moore is a Lingerie Hottie
Truth be told, Teresa Moore is a hottie no matter what you put her in, or out of, as the case may be. Which reminds me: modeling is probably the only occupation where hot women voluntarily take their clothes off in front of ugly men who then can’t touch them, but can tell them what to do. And if that last statement actually makes any bit of sense to you, then you definitely need to get out of your attic more, because there is nothing worst than a mind that spends too much time in the attic. So what was I saying? Oh right. Teresa Moore is a really hot lingerie model, and she just happens to be wearing some lingerie in these photos. Please to ogle.
Adriana Lima Wants to Show You Her Bra
Oh come on, you know you’ve been dying to see this ever since you heard that Victoria’s Secret had a supermodel who was claiming to be a virgin, and was saving herself for marriage. Whether that is true or not, we’ll never know, but you know what we can be sure of? Just the sight of Adriana Lima holding a pair of bra in front of her is pretty damn sexy. I don’t know if it’s sexier than seeing, say, Adriana Lima without her bra and standing in front of you in your basement, but it’s pretty damn close. I’d call it a close second. Anyways, here’s Adriana Lima at a Victoria’s Secret department store promoting a pair of bras. Wow. I want me some bras. With Adriana Lima in it. Or out. Either/or.
Holly Valance Wants to be Taken
You may or may not have seen Aussie pop singer Holly Valance showing up on American TV. Or you might have seen a very nice looking blonde (or brunette), and it didn’t quite register that it was her. Well you need to pay more attention, schmucks, because Holly Valance has been making inroads into Hollywood, starting with a starring role in last year’s “DOA: Dead or Alive”, a co-starring role in the upcoming Liam Neeson movie “Taken” (hence the post title, ahem), and quite a few guest appearances on TV shows like Shark, Moonlight, CSI: New York, and of course, her breakthrough, as a Russian hottie in Prison Break. And oh yeah, did I mention she’s showcased in the current issue of FHM? What, I didn’t? Well, I always meant to.
Emily Scott Gives Great Eyes
Rumor has it that when she was 9, Australian model, actress, and former Lipton Ice Tea spokeswoman Emily Scott went toe-to-toe with a kangaroo and busted it up something pretty awful. True story. Well, as true as my buddy Rod says, anyways, and although Rod once convinced me that Bigfoot was real, he’s usually a pretty trustworthy guy. Anyways, there’s no denying that Aussie hotness Emily Scott is a fine looking woman. And yes, those eyes are pretty astounding. I would say they could start wars, but that would be a cliche, and we don’t trade in cliches around these here parts. Or at least, not on Mondays.
Brit Babe Invasion: Caroline Flack
Our Brit Babe for the day is one Caroline Flack. Who is she? No idea. She’s in a current issue of Maxim, and after seeing her, thought she looked hot, so here she is. Here’s Wikipedia with the research on her that I’m too lazy to do: “In March 2007, Caroline hosted the CBBC coverage of Comic Relief does Fame Academy. Caroline commentated on the semi-finals of the Eurovision Song Contest 2008 with Paddy O’ Connell. She also hosted Big Brother’s Big Mouth for Week 5 of the 2008 Series. Daily Mirror journalist Rob Leigh noted that ‘her sharp delivery makes her the best presenter they’ve had on this series.’” So he noted her sharp delivery but not the sharp body? Must be gay. Check out Caroline Flack.
Rose McGowan’s Red Sonja Posters
Who would have thunk that after all the rumors that Rose McGowan was going to play space slut — er, I mean, space adventurer Barbarella, that the first posters we’d get of Rose in barely any clothes would be posters for … Red Sonja? That’s right. They’ve made up posters for a new version of “Red Sonja” set to star Rose McGowan. Now you may not think a girl as pale and not-all-that-bulky as Rose McGowan could actually sell herself as a barbarian Queen like Red Sonja, but then again you haven’t considered the magic of photoshop yet. Check out these concept art poster/whatever of Rose McGowan as Red Sonja. Yeah, yeah, I know that cleavage isn’t real, but don’t tell my other brain that.
Random Supermodel of the Day: Melissa Baker
I’ve never heard of Melissa Baker, but according to Wikipedia, she’s an American supermodel. So right there, I’m going to take their word for it and call her a supermodel, so which gives me the perfect excuse to post pictures of her in our Random Supermodel of the Day category. But wait, does she really qualify? Well, she’s been in the 2008 Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue, and really, when you’ve been in the swimsuit edition of SI, isn’t that all that needs to be said. Although I have to admit, Melissa Baker looks a tad more meat, as it were, than your regular SI model. But hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little meat on the bones, am I right or am I right? I certainly wouldn’t kick her out of bed. Or my basement.
Down Under with Aleisha Cowcher
What’s a girl to do after winning the Australian version of Big Brother? Show up in lads magazines, of course. Hey, if even the losers get to do this, why wouldn’t the winner get the same thing? Aleisha Cowcher won the 2007 version of Australia Big Brother, and as a result won herself a ranch full of kangaroos and whatever else they give away over there is Australia. The perky blonde and her nice rack initially worked as a hairdresser in Cobram, Victoria, before finding her way to the Big Brother show and winning the whole she-bang. Really, aside from the UK’s Hollyoaks, is there a better producer of babeness than the Big Brother campaign? I think not! Thank you, Big Brother. And some dude told us we should be wary of you. What an idiot!
Bar Refaeli Bikini Pictures
Isn’t posting pictures of supermodels vacation on beaches while wearing nothing but itty bitty bikinis kind of like finding a tape of a prostitute doing what prostitutes do best, i.e. earn her money? That is, isn’t it a little anti-climactic? Haven’t we seen Bar Refaeli at least a million times in a bikini? Or sometimes, even less than a bikini? So really, are these pictures of her in a vacation spot really all that big of a deal? Sure, she’s hot and all, and that body sure looks awesomely awesome, but I find myself being a tad … underwhelmed. Sigh. Maybe I should … Oh who am I kidding. Psyche! Bar Refaeli is looking goooooooooood. Please to ogle.
Brazil’s Latest Hotport Fabiana Semprebom
That’s right, kids, Brazil has given us so many uber hot women that I’ve made up a new word to describe their greatest import — hot women. Just you wait, people will be using “hotports” like it’s going out of style in a few days. Kids will be running around school campuses going, “Dude, check out that hotport!” And I won’t make a dime off it. Such is the life of a creative genius like myself. Anyhoo, where was I? Oh right. Brazil’s latest hotport is one Fabiana Semprebom, who is apparently part Brazilian, Italian, and American. Maybe we should come up with another word: Bralicanport! (Holy crap, where do I come up with this stuff? I must be, like, a genius and shit.)
Rhona Mitra is Kate Beckinsale Lite in Underworld 3 Promos
In “Underworld 3: Rise of the Lycans”, British babe Rhona Mitra slips on fellow British babe Kate Beckinsale’s skin-tight pleather to play a medieval, sword-swinging hot chick who fights vampires. And werewolves. Probably both, but hopefully not at the same time, cause that would be pretty tough. What are the chances that Rhona Mitra will take off the skin-tight black pleather in a gratuitously revealing sex scene ala “Underworld 2: Evolution”? No idea, but one can only hope. Here are some promos from the upcoming movie. In the flick, Rhona Mitra plays Sonja, not to be confused with Red Sonja, who has red hair. Rhona has black hair, and so does her Sonja. Thus ends this lesson on Sonjas in Cinema.
Alyssa Sutherland’s (Mostly) Bikini Goodness
So Alyssa Sutherland. Who is she? She’s a model who is trying to make her way in the world of acting. Which is pretty hard to do, but thankfully for our lass, she’s kind of hot. And freckled, too. Not a lot of girls can pull off hot while hosting more freckles on her face than a beach, but Alyssa Sutherland pulls it off. Of course, the long legs, the slender frame, and the simply gorgeous face helps just a tad. When you’re this pretty, people call your freckles “beauty marks”, whereas they’re “Oh God, those are gross” when you’re not nearly as pretty as Alyssa Sutherland. Anyways, she recently had a gust spot on the cancelled TV show New Amsterdam, and IMDB.com doesn’t list any other new credits. Come on, someone, put this girl on regular TV! I’d, like, watch every day. Probably.
Brit Babe Invasion: Jessica Jane Clement
Jessica-Jane Clement is hot and the name makes you think Southern Belle, but she’s actually from Sheffield, South Yorkshire, England. She also liable to rip you off if given the chance. I don’t mean she’ll come to your house, knock on your door, and when you open it she’ll rip you in half. I mean the girl will probably con you out of your hard-earned pocket watch. (People still carry around pocket watches, right?) Jessica-Jane Clement is a British model, actress, and one of the stars of The Real Hustle, a show that goes around hustling people in order to educate them so they won’t be hustled in the future. See, that would never happen to me. If a pretty girl walks up to me, I’d just punch her. Sure, it cuts down on my social life, but better safe than sorry, right?
Rosanna Davison is Out of This World
Hey, remember that ’80s song “The Lady in Red”? By that one-hit wonder Chris De Burgh? Well guess what — the dude had a daughter, and her name is Rosanna Davison. If the name doesn’t ring a bell, then maybe this will help: Rosanna Davison won the Miss World title in 2003 for Ireland. What’s Miss World, you ask? Well it’s like Miss Universe, minus the Universe part. See, whereas Miss Universe represents the entire universe as a whole, Miss World only gets to represent our puny little planet. Can you imagine trying to win a beauty pageant in Venus or Mars, or Alpha Centauri? Man, I tell you, if you haven’t tried to win anything on Alpha Centauri, you don’t know how hard it is. Anyhoo, here’s Rosanna Davison. No “She’s the Lady in Red” jokes, please.
Tatyana Ali in King Magazine
Shockingly, if you check out Tatyana Ali’s filmography on IMDB.com, the little lass has worked steadily pretty much since The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air went off the air and Will Smith became the biggest movie star in the world, despite starring in only one worthwhile film in his entire career. But nevermind Will Smith. Let’s get back to Tatyana Ali. Ashley Banks is all grown up and is featured in an issue of King Magazine. I haven’t a clue what King Magazine does, but I’m assuming showing hot chicks in varying shades of undress is one of them. So here’s Ashley Banks looking all hot and stuff in King. Carlton would never approve, but we would.
So What’s Amy Acker Been Up to?
So what has Amy Acker, the impossibly cute (and dare I say it, even hot?) girl from Angel? Well, after Angel was cancelled, she’s been doing guest spot on other people’s TV shows, being that once you’ve been a regular on one TV show, it’s pretty easy to get guest spots on other people’s TV shows. That’s just how TV works. I should know, in a past life, I was a child star with a coke habit. But I digress. Amy Acker will be re-teaming with Eliza Dushku in Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse, where she’ll be playing a doctor. A really, really awesomely hot doctor, that is. Watch out, Eliza, here comes Amy! Well okay, maybe it won’t be that ominous, but I’ll be damn if I’m not gonna be watching Dollhouse as a result. A reminder of Amy Acker’s hotness follows.
'Pampita' is SO HOT!!! 
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WFO! 
Tila Tequlia i am i love with you and i am not just saying that. i wacthed both seasons of ...
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