The Random Stuff of Interests Page

Hey, kids, remember Stacy Keibler? She was supposed to be the next big thing after her stint on Dancing with the Stars. Only it didn’t turn out that way. I don’t know why, to be honest with you. Stacy Keibler is one of the hottest girls on the planet, bikini or not, and she really should be more famous right now. But she’s not. Such is the inequities of life. Or Hollywood. Either/or. Anyways, Stacy Keibler and her publicist wants to remind you that she’s still around, thus this latest appearance in FHM magazine. We’d like to thank Stacy Keibler for reminding us that she’s still around. We had forgotten. We have bad memories here at the Random Page.

Like most Spanish actresses, Paz Vega is no stranger to nudity. She’s looking smoking hot in this spread for the Spanish version of FHM, but if you’re into a Paz Vega fix, I would take a look at her Spanish movies. In America, a well-known actress taking her clothes off in a movie is a cause for controversy; in Europe, it’s another day on the movie set. God bless the Europeans. They don’t do a whole lot of things right, but they sure know how to convince their hot actresses to take off their clothes. Here’s Paz Vega, who is still trying to conquer Hollywood the last time I checked, in FHM giving the boys what they want. Man, that’s one pretty face.

Granted, there’s not a whole lot of clothing that Megan Fox WOULDN’T look good in, but this pair of jeans just … yeah, wow. She even looks good with that big honkin’, fugly Marilyn Monroe tattoo on her arm. Really, what the hell was she thinking getting that? Anyways, enough with the fugly tattoo. The thing about Megan Fox is, she’s now single, boys, which means you still have no shot. Oh well. By the way, how do you think Megan puts those jeans on in the morning? I mean, how tight are those? Does she, like, get lowered into them via a crane or something? Good God those are some tight jeans!

Hey, remember Cindy Taylor? You know, the very popular host of the E! Channel’s Wild On TV show? She took over for Brooke Burke, remember? No? Well nevermind then. Just know that Cindy Taylor is a really hot American model who has been on TV once, not all that long ago, and she’s one of those girls who was born to wear a bikini. Which is what she’s doing in most of these pictures. Yeah, funny how that works, huh? Please enjoy some Cindy Taylor for your Monday, and let’s get to work being productive for The Man, cause you know you’re just a tool working hard for The Man, aren’t you? Aren’t you?

Your weekend send-off for this week is brought to you by Brazil’s own Fernanda Mello, a model who might convince you to misspell the word mellow next time. Yes, that makes perfect sense, you’re just not cool enough to get it. But never you mind that, let’s focus on what you’re going to do this weekend, and who you’re going to avoid, namely that creepy girl from down the office who keeps giving you the eye. You think to yourself that she might be interested, but if so, why does she keep spreading all those rumors that you have STDs, which just ain’t right. This weekend, you should ask her why she’s all up in your biz, and if she refuses, accuse her of sexual harassment. Always works for me.

Gaby Espino is a Venezuelan model (usually strutting around in bikinis, thank you very much) who is also the pitchwoman for something called Polar Beer. It’s a beer brand that I’ve never heard of, but it’s got a polar bear on it. I think that’s a polar bear. It could be a giant cat. Who knows what they grow down there in Venezuela. But I digress. Gaby Espino is the pitchwoman for the beer, which usually involves her going around in a bikini selling it to the public. Here she is on the beach with a blonde friend selling the beer. I would buy it, but I would be more prone to buying it if they would just start touching and giggling. That would be, like, really awesome hot.

With a name like Thais Souza Wiggers, you just know our Latin Flavor of the Day, Brazilian hottie has to be a hottie. You just don’t go through life with that kind of name unless you’re blonde and tall and can turn heads and get guys to do things for you, like beat up the girls making fun of your name. Plus, it’s not like guys will be making fun of her. Well they might, but probably just to get her attention, which is when she convinces them to jump off a roof, cause that’s just how hot women behave, don’t you know. Anyways, where was I? Oh right. Please to enjoy some Thais Souza Wiggers. She’s Thai Souza-rific.

You know, I wish I was into this Dragonball thing that all the kids are into, then that way I might be more excited about seeing “Dragonball” on the big screen. But I’m not, mostly because I’m not a virgin and I kinda have a girlfriend, although she keeps playing games with restraining orders and what have you. She’ll come around. Anyhoo, I wish I was into Dragonball, then maybe I’d be more into these pictures of Emmy Rossum as Bulma from the movie. What kind of name is Bulma? Sounds like an old fat chick with 10 cats, not a hot young thing like Emmy Rossum. She’s quite the hot young thing, you know.

Lingerie models are like taffy, and everyone loves taffy. Sure, it tends to get a little sticky, especially in the early beginnings, and there you are, trying to chew on it, and it keeps getting stuck in the little crevices between your teeth. It’s annoying, to be sure, but then again, it just tastes so good, you keep putting more taffy in and chewing, and getting even more into those crevices. You really should stop, because taffy is not good for your teeth, but you can’t help yourself. Like lingerie models. That’s what lingerie models are like. Taffy. Honest, this makes perfect sense. Anyways, here’s Chelina Manuhutu, your Lingerie Model of the Day in some — what else? — lingerie.

Sure, there are a lot of reasons to watch mixed martial arts fighting. You got your fighting, which is always good for a sit-down, and you got your blood, which is a must have, and there is the drama of seeing if one guy can pound the other guy’s face into a flat mush of meat and bones covered in blood. Okay, kind of gory. But you know it ain’t ballet, right? Another reason to watch MMA fighting? Gina Carano. Of course you already know that by now. I don’t even know if Gina Carano still does MMA fighting, since she seems to have gone into acting and TV now, what with the American Gladiator stuff and modeling she’s been doing. Here she is in Maxim, reminding you again why chicks who can beat you up are kinda hot.

The gorgeous Danneel Harris is most known for playing a character on the TV show One Tree Hill. You know, the show about the house next to the tree? On the hill? I’m pretty sure that that’s what the show was about. I could be wrong, but probably not. Anyhoo. Danneel Harris is the really hot redhead on the show. You can’t miss her. Or if you did miss her, you won’t now after she’s returned to the pages of Maxim magazine. You know, bikinis always look good on hot girls, but for some reason, it looks especially good on a hot redhead. In case you haven’t noticed, I think Danneel Harris is pretty damn hot.

Our Random Model of the Day is Lisa Cazzulimi, who hails from the Land Down Under. No, I’m not talking about China, I’m talking about Australia! Man, your geography sucks, guys. Anyways, who is Lisa Cazzulimi, exactly? I haven’t a clue, but she definitely qualifies for our Random Model of the Day category, being that she’s a model, and today is a day. I’m not sure what day it is exactly, since I’ve run our of my daily brew of Red Bull, and you know what that means — yup, it’s another full day of wandering around in a daze, not knowing where I’m going, where I’ve been, and getting mugged by schoolgirls after 4:00 p.m. Cause, you know, that’s when schoolgirls get out of school. Ahem. Get some Lisa Cazzulimi.

Speaking of Freida Pinto and “Slumdog Millionaire” (remember we were just talking about them?), here’s the music video “Jai Ho” from the movie. As we all know, the word “Jai Ho” means “Dude, where’s my loaf of bread? You didn’t steal it, did you?” Because, you know, the movie is about the slums of India, and how everyone there is a thief. Or something like that. Look, it won like a gazillion Oscars. That’s gotta count for something, right? Better than winning none, I suppose. Anyways, here’s that insanely catchy video for “Jai Ho” starring Freida Pinto and those other people. Baila! Baila! Indeed.

It’s nice to be in a movie that wins every award imaginable at the Oscars. Or it seems that way for “Slumdog Millionaire”, a movie where the incredibly smoking hot Freida Pinto played the object of the leading character’s love, lust, and everything in between. And can you blame the kid? Check out Freida Pinto in the latest issue of Complex magazine. Not sure how Freida Pinto is going to do in Hollywood, but God willing, it’ll be a long career. Or if it’s short, then please, God, let it be in something that has the words “erotic” and “thriller” in it. Pretty please?

Our Brit Babe of the Day is one Amy Guy, a former beauty pageant queen turned American Glaidator. Or, er, British Gladiator. She’s the Gladiator Siren in the British version of the American game show American Gladiators, where unwitting morons get the tar beaten out of them by hulking dudes and gals in leotards. Amy Guy doesn’t look all that hulking to me, which leads me to believe that instead of battering her victims into submission, she seduces them, and just when they least expect it, delivers the killing strike to the nuts. I could be wrong, of course, but I’m guessing not. Anyways, Amy Guy is one hot gal, and she’s our Brit Babe of the Day.

Our Random Foreign Babe of the Day is Ukrainian pop singer Svetlana Loboda, who is most famous for her hit song “Mishka”. It’s a pretty funky little song, and of course by ‘funky’ I mean completely terrible to anyone who probably doesn’t understand Russian. Or Ukrainian. Same language, right? Anyhoo, according to her official bio, Svetlana Loboda is supposedly 26 years old. I say supposedly because well, okay, they may party pretty hard over there in the Ukraine, but I gotta say, Svetlana Loboda may be hot and sporting the body of an 18 year old, but seriously? She’s 26? Okay, if you say so. I’ll go along with it as long as she keeps looking this good.

Granted, Odette Yustman’s first starring role didn’t exactly go gangbusters at the box office. Okay, so it didn’t just NOT go gangbusters, it sort of burst into flames and got buried at the box office. But whatever. That movie was all about Odette Yustman for me. The underwear scene was to die for. And hey, just because some money about some ghost kid didn’t make it for the moviegoing public, it doesn’t mean Odette Yustman still doesn’t have a stellar career in front of her. Failing that, more appearances like this in Arena magazine will be just a-okay with me. Her manager probably thinks differently, but what does he know.

At one point in time, Christina Milian was supposed to be the next great pop star. Even before anyone knew who she was (or the public at large anyways) she was in a big-time Hollywood movie and had an album coming out. Or maybe it was the other way around. Well the point is, she was primed to be the next big thing, but somewhere along the way, it just didn’t work out. I don’t know anyone who has ever heard a Christina Milian song, and I can’t recall the last time she was in a movie playing the lead, if she ever did. Point is, Christina Milian seems to have disappeared after a promising start, but maybe this latest appearance in King Magazine will change all that. Probably not, but I ain’t complainin’.

It’s a good thing former OC star Mischa Barton doesn’t have problems with showing up in men’s magazines and going the barely clothed route, especially considering how her career is starting to fizzle out. You sort of need to keep putting yourself out there in the public eye to get those nice movie roles, I would imagine, or you might end up doing movies that go straight to DVD for the rest of your life. Here’s Mischa Barton in the latest issue of FHM, proving that she’s still got what it takes for movie stardom. And if not, eh, she’s still got what it takes for my fantasies, and isn’t that what’s really important?

So it’s Monday, and you’re headed back to the grind, and you think life sucks all over again after convincing yourself that life kinda rules over the weekend. Or maybe that was the booze talking. Stupid booze, always trying to convince you of something that’s not true. Anyhoo. Well guess what, life does kinda suck, and so does your job. But you know what doesn’t suck? Maria Sharapova and her long, long legs. Here they are on display. I think this is an ad for a motorcycle or something. Maybe it’s a photoshoot for candy. Who knows. They sure look good, don’t they? God, I love Mondays. (Thanks, booze! And Maria Sharapova legs!)