The Random Stuff of Interests Page

Nell McAndrew has probably got the best body in all of Great Britain. Okay, there are a couple of challengers that I can think of at the top of my head, one being Abigail Clancy, who has got it going on, but she’s still relatively young so you would expect her to have a nice body. But Nell McAndrew is in her ’30s, practically ancient in the world of modeling (or so I’m told), and take a look at those abs. Holy cow. Here’s Nell McAndrew from an old issue of Front Magazine (way back in 2003), which I hear is a lot better than Back Magazine, but then again you probably already know that. And did I already mention it? Nell McAndrew is slammin’.

Their tagline is, “You wanna live in the zip, you gotta live by the code.” Yes. It sucks that much donkey ass. But hey, you probably liked the original too, didn’t you? Well guess what, you’re going to get more of the same. Well, okay, the guys who made this one threw in a token black dude — an ADOPTED one at that, because, you know, black folks don’t know how to raise their kids, or can’t, so white folks gotta lend a hand. And stuff. Basically, it’s another TV show starring people in their late ’20s acting like teenagers, written by people in their ’30s, trying to write “young”. You know, like the original 90210. Watch it. Love it. Then go shoot yourself. And if it’s teen and it blows, you gotta know it’s going to be on the CW, doncha?

To be honest with you, I don’t know if this says more about the cult of personality that is Oprah, or the women who watches and attends her shows, or just women in general. So check out this clip from Oprah’s show, where she announces that she’s NOT going to be giving away free stuff to her audience, but her audience goes bonkers anyway. Remember, she said she’s NOT going to be giving away free stuff, but all they hear is “Oprah’s Favorite Things” and goes completely insane. I mean, out of their motherlovin’ minds. Now I don’t know if Oprah ended up giving these moonbats free stuff or not, the video is only two minutes long, but holy mother of God, I am so glad I’m not a chick. Seriously, if not for the boobs and you know what down there, I wouldn’t even bother with the lot of ‘em.

When Hilary Duff’s parents were trying to come up with a name for her, and they settled on Hilary, did you think they spent another extra minute or so pondering the pros and cons of adding an extra “l” to her name? Now before you brush it off, think about it, there are definite pros and cons to having an extra “l” in your name. For one, you wouldn’t have to constantly write the extra “l”, which would, like, save you about a day or two from now to the time you’re dead. But on the other hand, you’d have to constantly answer that your name only has one “l” when people ask you in school or when they’re writing your name, which would add additional days or two to your life from now to the end of your death. Now that I think about it, it probably would even out anyways. Anyhoo. Here’s Hilary Duff in Allure magazine.

I don’t know for sure, and you probably shouldn’t put money on this being true, but I’m reasonably certain there is some kind of law against a country singer subjecting herself to this kind of totally random acts of hotness, especially at an event where more than 100 people are wearing cowboy hats. Or if there isn’t one, then there probably should be, since I don’t think there has been a country music singer who has captured the imagination of horny fanboys everywhere (okay, maybe that’s stretching it a bit; but definitely the horny country music listening ones) like new Goddess Taylor Swift. Whatever possessed her to perform onstage at last night’s CMA Awards with water pouring all over her? I don’t know, but I ain’t acomplainin’, as they say down south.

Hey, Smallville fans, I got some bad news for ya. If Supergirl in her short-shorts, midriff-baring shirt, and go-go boots was the reason you still tune into that aging show, then you’re probably not gonna be tuning in for long. Word on the Internet is that Laura Vandervoort, the Canadian Goddess who plays Supergirl on the show, will be only showing up for a few eps, and then she’ll be gone forever. Which will free Laura Vandervoort up time to do movies like “Into the Blue 2″, sequel to that Jessica Alba award winning film about really hot people in skimpy two-piece bikinis walking around beaches and diving into water and what have you. My guess is that this is Laura Vandervoort enjoying some downtime in-between shooting “Into the Blue 2″. I could be wrong, of course, but does it matter? Laura Vandervoort. Bikini. Ogle.

What do you do when your TV show is about to get canned? Show up in as many magazines as you can, wearing as little clothes as you can without being exploitative, of course. Or, if it turns out to be a tad exploitative, hey, it’s all in the name of art, right? Mind you, not that I’m complaining, even though I don’t really “get” why Grace Park, Tricia Helfer, and Katee Sackhoff, aka the Battlestar Galactica Girls, are riding around in, apparently, the desert on hogs wearing little more than undies and chaps in this latest issue of Interview Magazine. But hey, “getting” the context of things is grossly overrated. Give me a half-naked Tricia Helfer, Grace Park, and Katee Sackhoff anyday.

The Internet is a pretty weird place, and it just got weirder with the invent of YouTube. Besides allowing every loser with the ability to videocast put their opinions on the net (you know, sorta like this dumbass site), YouTube has allowed people to “challenge” each other over a period of days by way of video. You’ve got dance-offs, rap-offs, and video responses to something or rather. Now you have … stare contests? Uh huh. There is apparently a whole slew of this crap on YouTube at the moment, and Jessica Alba, apparently finding time between being preggers with some dude’s love child, threw down her own gauntlet. It’s really stupid, but I gotta admit, having a really hot woman like Jessica Alba stare at you for two minutes is kinda hot.

If you’ve been listening to the Democrat talking heads on TV (and pretty much whenever they get the chance they’ll tell you), John McCain is old. Really, really old. So old that, apparently, if a wind blew at him, it would blow him to another State. McCain has heard it, heard the late-night jokes, and he decided to not fight it; instead, he joined in. I saw the tail end of his guest appearance on Saturday Night Live last night, and found the YouTube version. My favorite: “The oldness it takes to protect America, to honor her, love her and tell her about what cute things the cat did.” Will it backfire? Who knows. America loves people who makes fun of themselves. It might just be crazy enough to work for the old timer…

As far as I can tell, Dukai Regina is a singer and model from Hungary, which according to my masterful command of world geography, is located somewhere between Canada and Alaska. Information on the lass in English is scarce, if by “scarce” you mean almost non-existent. But since there are a couple of YouTube music videos of her, I take that to mean she’s a somewhat popular singer in Hungary. By the way, if people from Hungary are called Hungarians, and people from America are called Americans, why aren’t people from France called Francians? Yes, it’s that kind of deep, philosophical thinking you’ll find here every day at the Random Page. Anyhoo. Dukai Regina. Sunday Treat. Please to enjoy.

The weekend is such a hassle, right? I mean, all that sun and free time, and what are you supposed to do with it all? You know what I think? It’s too much. Overkill, if you will. So how do you survive the weekend until Monday, when we’ll be putting out new posts? Why, here’s a little sumthin’ sumthin’ to hold you boys over. A little dash of Petra Nemcova never heard no one. She’s a model, you know. A supermodel, as I hear it. She also dates lots of famous people, musicians, and what have you. Which basically rules out Petra Nemcova dating any one of us, being that we don’t have a job and still live at home with our parents, but ONLY because we’re still looking for that perfect bachelor’s pad. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

Seriously, who is cranking out these R&B babes, and where are they secretly keeping the R&B Babe Cranking Machine, because I gotsta get me one for the attic. Ashanti is not one of the R&B crooners I’m overly familiar with; I know the name, and I’m reasonably certain I’ve heard one or two of those songs that she used to do with a Rapper of the Week, but I don’t think I’ve ever really invested a lot of time exploring her discography, which I believe is a biography of disco. Or at least that’s what Wikipedia tells me, and it’s never been wrong before. Anyhoo. Here’s Ashanti back in a recent ish (as the kids say) of Maxim.

Okay, so Anna Kournikova is no longer tennis’ biggest draw. Heck, does she even still play tennis? I don’t know, because frankly I stopped watching ladies tennis a while ago, back when I could no longer stand the grunting. Seriously, what’s up with the grunting? It was kinda sexy for a while, but then it just got really annoying. Anyhoo. She may not technically qualify as an athlete anymore, but that’s not going to stop advertisers from going to Anna Kournikova to sell their wares. One of those forward-thinking folks are KSwiss, who sells cats. White, furry cats. I think. Look, it’s not like I actually research this stuff, you know.

You’re never going to mistake our Latin Flavor of the day, a model named Ana Luiza Castro, as one of those skinny skanks that graces runways and magazines nowadays, because Ana Luiza Castro is all meat and bones and she still manages to look gangbusters in a two-piece bikini. Now I don’t know all that much about Ana, or what her background is like, but if I had to guess, I would say the girl comes from either Mexico or Argentina or thereabouts. Basically, she’s Latin, and that’s all you need to know. That, and she’s really smokin’.

In case you haven’t heard, The New Kids on the Block (or NKOTB as they were later re-named in a stab at adulthood cash “back in the day”) are back together and are going on a reunion tour. Now this in itself isn’t all that surprising (everyone’s doing reunion tours nowadays), but it is surprising that Donnie Wahlberg decided to return. The guy’s got a thriving acting career going on, and he decides to come back to dance onstage? Hmm, I wonder if Donnie is still going to do his tough guy act. Remember he was the tough guy in the bunch? Anyways, and I’m ashame to admit this, but I did use to listen to these guys. But in my defense, I was a wee bit lad, and I just wanted to be Donnie, is all, but didn’t we all? The kids’ first single off their new album is “Summertime”.

Wait a minute, didn’t they already tried a show like this on ABC staring Carla Gugino, and it got canceled? Oh wait, that one was called Karen Sisco, and this one’s called In Plain Sight. Also, instead of Gugino, the USA Network has Mary McCormack, who I’ve had a mad crush on ever since playing Howard Stern’s long-suffering wife in the movie “Private Parts”. Mind you, not that I’m going to do anything about said crush, like, go to her house and stuff. I mean, come on, I’m not crazy or anything. (Plus gas is so expensive right now and I don’t know if I can afford the trip.) Anyhoo, here are some promos from Mary’s new show In Plain Sight on the USA Network. Mary plays a way-too-hot-to-be-one U.S. Marshall who guards a bunch of witness protection idiots. Much hilarity ensues. It co-stars Nichole Hiltz, who looks, er, weird.

Let’s face it, if real female cops looked as good as the ones on the CSI shows, a lot of guys would be lining up to pull some crimes. But seriously, CSI must be the sweetest gig in the world. You show up at a fake crime scene in designer clothes and shoes, you spit out some snappy one-liners, and then spend the next week memorizing forensics techno babble, and collect a big paycheck. You gotta wonder why anyone would leave these shows. Well Jorja Fox recently left, and now they’ve replace her with Lauren Lee Smith, who will be playing a flirtatious character named Bryce Adams. And yes, the babe factor has not declined one bit. In fact, I dare say that Lauren Lee Smith has added to it. Proof below.

Wait, People.com is posting bikini pictures of young TV starlets on vacation now? Wow, I guess I need to go to People.com more often! Their latest catch is Gossip Girl star Blake Lively, who showed up on vacation somewhere with some dude from her show doing a little (or a lot) of PDA’ing. Seriously, it must be nice to be young and rich and famous and be able to look good in a bikini. Mind you, not that I’ve thought about how great it would look if I slipped on a bikini, I’m just saying … er, let’s move on, shall we? Blake Lively with some dude name Penn something, who apparently plays her boyfriend on the show. (Yeah, that’s gonna work out.) Bikini pictures of Blake, who despite the name, is all woman, baby. OMFG, as the kids say.

My appreciation for actress Emmanuelle Chriqui’s combination of uber cuteness and next-door hotness is legendary. (And of course by “legendary” I mean it’s bordering on becoming a problem; no, seriously, someone get me some help.) Emmanuelle’s latest attempt to turn me into nothing more than a pool of dripping saliva is an appearance in GQ magazine, where she goes topless, with a shirt covering the good bits. Wait, does that qualifies as topless? Well, sort of, I guess, although since she has something on, it’s not technically topless, but she isn’t covering up her chest with a bra or some such, so maybe it does qualify — eh, nevermind. Emanuelle Chriqui, including some bikini pictures, of course.

I said this last week, and I’ll repeat here for your edification: “Syesha, the last girl standing, will be gone by next week, leaving the two Davids. And with the kids still voting, Archuleta’s got this thing sown up.” And guess what? As I predicted, Syesha was knocked off tonight, leaving the girly man and the grown-up alt rocker. Next week you can take it to the bank: The girly man will win. Why? Because I said so, and like the title says, I am God. Isn’t that enough? No? Dammit. Okay, because it’s obvious. How about that? The last few weeks of American Idol have been as predictable as Britney Spears’ little sister getting knocked up.