The Random Stuff of Interests Page

There’s absolutely no reason why you should be excited about “seeing a Woody Allen movie”, unless you’re a film snob, in which case mentioning that you’re “going to go see a Woody Allen movie” to anyone within earshot is probably the best thing about your day, which is kind of pathetic, but whatever, it’s your life. Anyhoo. Why should you care about watching this trailer for “Vicky Cristina Barcelona”? Because it’s the movie where, word has it, Scarlett Johansson (the Woodman’s latest muse) gets into a threesome with some lucky Spanish dude and a skanky Penelope Cruz. There’s also supposed to be a major lesbian make-out scene. Hey, you can see some of that in this trailer! Now if the actual movie is half as sleaze-tastic as the trailer, then the Woodman has done a fine job. If not? Not so much.

Now I don’t know if this Natalia Rodriguez that showed up a few years ago in FHM is the same one from Wikipedia that I’m about to fill you in on, but hey, if it’s not, then whatever, it’ll just be another person I mistook for someone else. So what else is new? Anyways, here’s Wikipedia: “Natalia Rodríguez Gallego is the full name of the Spanish singer Natalia. She was a contestant on the successful Spanish TV show Operación Triunfo in 2001, where she finished 14th. She is the Spanish Pop Princess.” You know, they call me a Pop Princess, too, but not because I know how to sing. Um, but perhaps I’ve said too much.

Let’s face it, America; you got no one to blame but yourself. NBC gave you a perfectly good opportunity to ogle Michelle Ryan every week for the next few years, and what did you do? You refused to take them up on it. Instead, you allowed Michelle Ryan’s The Bionic Woman TV show to fall in the ratings, and it’s now been axed from the line-up. There, are you happy? You won’t be seeing easily the hottest British import to hit American shores since Kate Beckinsale on TV on a weekly basis anymore. You’ve been a bad, bad boy. Now go to your room and think about what you’ve done! In the meantime, see what you’ll be missing. Holy God, that is a body. Is that a body? Now THAT is a body, boys.

How hot it is to listen to a really hot girl talk dirty? Olivia Munn is one such hot girl, and she was talking pretty dirty in this behind-the-scenes clip from her Complex video shoot. Basically it’s just two minutes of Olivia sitting in a chair doing a gag about which male body odor spray will make a girl jump your bones, and if that works, what else would it do? She also throws out some Asian jokes and a couple of f-bombs, so don’t play this while you’re at work, boys, and I know some of you are at work right now. You dirty, dirty little bastards. What are you doing visiting this site while your boss is walking up and down the hallway? Anyhoo. Olivia Munn talks dirty. God, she’s hot.

I don’t know what this says about Shannon Elizabeth’s movie career, but she’s getting to be known more as a celebrity who plays poker than an actress who sometimes plays poker. She really seems to love the game, and hey, why not? Poker is great fun, and a great way to lose your house to that creepy neighbor down the street who insists on playing poker with you, but only if his buddy “Rich” can join them, Rich being from out of town and what not. So what was I saying? Oh right, Shannon Elizabeth is in the current issue of Maxim Magazine, and though it’s not spectacular, Shannon Elizabeth is still easy on the eyes, and it’s good enough.

Can you really blame Han Solo for grabbing a handful of Princess Leia boobage after seeing her in that gold metal bikini being fondled by the disgusting Jabba the Hutt? I bet while he was trapped in carbonite Han Solo had nothing but time to think about how he’d grab himself a handful of Princess Leia goodness when he got the chance. And as luck would have it, the chance came during the battle for the Ewok moon, when Princess Leia gets blasted, fell down, and Han Solo made his move. (Han Solo? More like All-Hands Solo!) Way to go, you rogue! (The video was put together by these guys, who had too much time on their hands, God bless’em.)

I gotta admit, the more I see of Adam Sandler’s new comedy “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan”, the more I’m liking it. It actually looks, you know, funny. But I do have one quibble with the film’s trailers: not enough Emmanuelle Chriqui. In fact, I don’t recall ever having seen Emmanuelle Chriqui in any of the trailers. I could be wrong, of course, but you know, probably not. So to make up for that great mistake by the film’s producers (or whoever cut those trailers), here are a couple of promos from “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan” featuring the incredibly cute as a button Emmanuelle Chriqui. And oh yeah, that Sandler guy, too.

Remember that old Saturday Night Live skit with Will Ferrell as one of those really lame personalities on a morning talk show, where the teleprompter suddenly dies and Ferrel and his co-host goes nuts, eventually becoming cannibals — all because the teleprompter refuses to “give them words” to read? Well apparently that’s not so far fetch. Here’s an old clip of Fox News’ Bill Oreilly blowing a huge gasket after he doesn’t quite “get” what his producers are trying to say on the teleprompters. Either that, or Bill doesn’t like Sting. Either way, it’s funny as hell, and shows you two sides of Bill O’Reilly — check out how quickly he shifts from nice on-air guy that’s all smiles to a raving lunatic throwing out f-bombs and verbally abusing his studio guys. Holy crap, this one’s gonna go around for a while!

I’ve always thought Lisa Edelstein was an ignored babe on FOX’s House. Of course, it’s not easy getting some attention when you have Jennifer Morrison in the cast with you. Then the producers went and added Olivia Wilde, whose character may or may not be a lesbian, and Lisa is once again put on the back burner, as it were. Thankfully she had a pretty nice role in last night’s episode, in which House ends up in a stripclub (where else?) after having been in an accident. He discovers that he was in a bus that crashed, and that someone needs his help, but he can’t remember who. Great episode, great ending, and Lisa Edelstein stripping in House’s brain was also nice, too. Screencaps from that scene forthwith.

Apparently Cynthia Nixon is gay. Did you know that? I didn’t. Then again, it’s not likel I care. As all five readers of the site knows, the only reason I don’t stab myself in the eye whenever someone mentions “Sex and the City” is because of Kristen Davis. She is, as the kids say, sooooooo hawt. In any case, Cynthia Nixon is apparently gay, and has been for a while (like, four years or something), and she’s talking about wanting a gay wedding because it’s “rebellious”. Oh who am I kidding. I can barely muster up the faux enthusiasm to write this crap. Here are some pictures of four totally hot chicks who dressed up as the girls from “Sex and the City” at the movie’s premiere in London. Wait, did I say “hot chicks”? I mean, pretty much the only hot one is the one posing as Kristen Davis. Just like in real life!

Australian supermodel and newest Victoria’s Secret gal Miranda Kerr was recently somewhere selling something called Heavenly Kiss, which I think is a shoe or something, for her slave masters at Victoria’s Secret (I spit on your need for research — PFFT!), and she was looking awfully good doing it, too. But then again, she is a world renown supermodel, after all, so looking awfully good doing things is pretty much the only criteria she had to meet, and oh my does Miranda Kerr ever meet said criteria. In fact, I’m pretty sure she would look stunning beating a baby seal with a club, which, I hear, the Victoria’s Secret models have to do at least once a month in order to maintain their girlish figure.

Let’s be honest here: Bai Ling with clothes on is not always a pretty sight. Forget for one moment that Godawful haircut she’s been sporting for the last few years (seriously, girl, hire a stylist, you can afford it!), but she’s got a rail-thin body that, with clothes draped over her, doesn’t quite look right. But you know what? Shockingly these bikini pictures of Bai Ling is not all bad. Sure, she could use a couple of more pounds on those bones, but you have to admit, she doesn’t look half bad. I mean, it’s not as if you can see her bones or anything; she’s not disgustingly skinny the way Nicole Richie was a few years ago pre-preggers. So give the girl that, if nothing else.

Our Random Foreign Babe of the Day is one Chelina Manuhutu, a 6-foot tall 23-year old Dutch model from the Netherlands, who according to her Myspace page, used to be a member of a band, but has since given stage life up for the much more satisfying (at least to those of us who gets to see her pictures) life of a world-renown model. Or at least she’ll be world-renown once she makes it onto the pages of Victoria’s Secret or Sports Illustrated, because let’s face it, until you’ve graced those two Holy Grails of Modeling, you’re just another pretty face in the crowd. But oh my, what a pretty face (and body) Chelina Manuhutu has. I’d go Dutch with that in a heartbeat.

This is just awesome. Seriously, just bloody awesome. An amateur photographer on safari in South Africa ran across a pride of lions just laying in wait for a family of Cape Buffaloes. When they get close enough, the lions strike, giving chase. The two adult buffaloes get away, but the lions manage to catch the baby buffalo and send it into the river. But that’s not the end of it. As the pride is trying to drag the defeated baby buffalo out of the river, a crocodile shows up and wants a piece! But wait, that’s not the end of it! Did I mention that the baby buffalo had parents, and his parents have friends? Lots and lots of friends…?

What’s that, you say? Isn’t The Hills fake to begin with anyway, and they’re all acting on it? Well, maybe, but it’s still not officially a fictional show, so, you know, go with the Reality TV stuff they’re trying to sell. Anyhoo. Audrina, following in the footsteps of faux MTV reality TV star Kristin Cavallari, has made the leap to acting. She’ll be co-starring in a direct-to-DVD sequel to the Jessica Alba bikini-fest called “Into the Blue”. This one will be called, strangely enough, “Into the Blue 2″, and will also co-star another TV hottie, Laura Vandervoort from Smallville. And yeah, I’m guessing they’ll be a lot of hunky guys walking around without their shirts too, for all you girls (and some guys) out there.

British actress Anna Popplewell shares something in common with another British lass who got a really big job her first time out and ended up doing it for years and years. I’m talking, of course, of Emma Watson, who has since grown up into a fine looking little lady before our eyes. Likewise with “Chronicles of Narnia’s” Anna Popplewell, who has really grown up since the first “Narnia” movie, and now is a full blown woman/babe in “Prince Caspian”. And yes, the fact that she seems to really know her way around the bow and arrow she’s working in these photos adds to the hotness like hotcakes. “Prince Caspian” opens May 16, followed by the third in the trilogy, “The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” sometime in 2010.

Monday blows, but former Hollyoaks girl (and now Life is Wild girl?) Tiffany Mulheron makes it that just a little bit more bearable. And if you know me at all, then you know that Mondays are particularly bad for me, mostly because I have to make an effort to get up very early in the morning and steal my neighbor’s newspaper. (You know, like in the comic strips and old timey TV shows? Yup, I still do it.) Now if you know my neighbor, then you know taking his newspaper is pretty hard to do. The guy is what people call a light sleeper, and I have to tip toe across his lawn to get to his paper. Then there’s his dog, who wakes up early on Mondays, which forces me to wake up even earlier. So you know, Monday blows. Tiffany Mulheron, though, does not. Especially in a bikini.

Let’s face it, Hillary Clinton isn’t going to be the first woman President in the United States, regardless of how many feminists burn their bras and crusade to get her elected. Is it because Americans aren’t ready for a female President? Eh, who knows. Maybe it’s those thunder thighs. Chances are if Hillary Clinton looked even a little bit like Italy’s new Minister of Equal Opportunity, Mara Carfagna, we might have given her the White House. The fact is, she doesn’t, and Mara Carfagna, a former beauty queen turned topless model turned politico turned the hottest Minister in all of Ministerdom, could probably get elected to Prime Minister if she ran. You gotta love the Italians. Or at least, ones that look like Mara Carfagna. Hey, we’re superficial that way.

Granted, you probably can’t figure out why Tila Tequila is famous, or even why she has a TV show on MTV where crazy whacked out freakazoids do battle to “get with her” (as the kids say — what, they still say that, don’t they?). Mind you, not that all that matters. The girl is certainly a looker, and her ability to squeeze into a two-piece bikini, such as in this spread for the June issue of Blender magazine, means you don’t need to “get” the girl to appreciate her. Famous for being famous? Probably. Do we mind? Duh. Of course not. Does a bear mind who gives him the free fish? (Yes, that makes perfect sense.)

She keeps trying to get out, but they keep pulling her back in! Yes, you heard the rumors, and it’s true — the CW is bringing back FOX’s Beverly Hills 90210. This isn’t the original show, remade, but it mind as well be. Instead, this will be some kind of spin-off show, and guess what? Jennie Garth is returning to the show and will be reprising her character Kelly Taylor. Mind you, not that I know who the hell Kelly Taylor is, but that’s what my TV just said, so I’m using this opportunity to post some really nice pictures of Jennie Garth. She is, as the kids say, hawt. So, um, tune into the CW. Better yet, don’t, and let’s hope it goes away very soon.