The Random Stuff of Interests Page

Let’s face it, when Ashlee Simpson first came onto the scene, it was pretty easy to tell her apart from her big sis Jessica. Pretty much everything she did was designed to remind you she WASN’T big sis. Then, something strange happened, and Ashlee started to look more and more like Jessica. For a while there, it was really, really weird. Now it appears as if Ashlee has once again gone her own way, and I have to say — not bad. Not bad at all. Ashlee Simpson showed up in the June issue of Shape Magazine in, as is Shape’s wont, a two-piece bikini, and let me tell you — not bad. Not bad at all, kids. But hey, don’t take my word for it; judge for yourself. Ashlee Simpson bikini pictures from Shape magazine.

Speaking of Australia (weren’t we just talking about Australia? well I was, even if it was to myself), one of its more famous faces, at least to us, is model Emily Scott. And hey, we aren’t the only ones saying it. In 2007, she was crowned “Sexiest Aussie Babe” by FHM magazine’s readers, and who is going to argue with those bright lads? Exactly. Anyhoo, here are some promo work that Emily Scott did for the cover of Clubland Xtreme Hardcore 3 which, according to the cover, comes with a bonus Hixxy CD, and come on, who doesn’t want their very own Hixxy CD? I know I do.

Let’s face it, Elisha Cuthbert’s movie career hasn’t exactly been going great. Of course, acting alongside Paris Hilton, aka the Movie Career Killer, didn’t exactly help, but we’re going to ignore that because, gosh dang it, we really like Elisha Cuthbert, and want her to resurrect her movie career, if only because we’re hoping to see something like this on the big screen very soon. Or on the small screen, preferably on DVD, where the pause button works a lot better than on the big screen. Wait, what? Yeah, I said it. Anyways. Elisha Cuthbert bikini pictures. Please to ogle.

As far as I know, Amanda Hinchcliffe is an Australian model, from, you know, Australia, and she seems to have the ability to look extremely good in a two-piece bikini. And lest you think that’s not a very extraordinary ability, let me assure you that it is indeed very much so. Have you ever gone to the beach lately? If I have to stare at a fatass staring back at me, covered in cellulite, I might just have to shoot myself. No, that would be too pain-free; I might have to stab myself in the eye, pull out the eyeball, and then throw it into the ocean. But I digress. Amanda Hinchcliffe. Hot. Check her out.

Obviously these pictures of Minnie Driver were taken a while ago, before she was pregnant, which she currently is, and is ready to drop that load any day now. (Mind you, not that I’m equating babies with, like, laundry, where you can just drop them, ahem.) Wait, where was I? Oh right. I’ve personally always found Minnie Driver to be very hot, but not a lot of people have agreed with me. Family Guy even had a great gag about how her head is so mammoth it can’t fit into a movie screen. But hey, for my money, that combination of British accent and the devil-may-care personality revs me all kinds of ways, all of them good. Here are what could possibly be some of the hottest Minnie Driver pictures I’ve ever seen. Change your minds yet?

If you’re an NBA fan, then you must be loving the playoffs. Forget the overrated Boston Celtics or the Lakers — it’s all about Chris Paul and the New Orleans Hornets. Yes, you heard me correct: Chris Paul and the bloody New Orleans Hornets. Now when was the last time you heard of the Hornets making waves in the Playoffs? Well they’re doing it now, and it’s all because of #3, third-year player Chris Paul. And no, I’m not being hyperbolic when I say this guy is, quite possibly, the best point guard to ever suit up for an NBA game since — well, I don’t know who has been this good in my lifetime. I’m sure there are old timers who were this good, but in MY time? Chris Paul is simply unstoppable on the court. Some highlights from his Game 2 against the Spurs for your viewing pleasure. I mean, he’s doing this against THE SPURS, for God’s sake.

Hey, we all wish we were hot, don’t we? Of course, sometimes being hot just isn’t enough — or maybe, it ends up being too much, and it gets us fired. From our teaching job. Because we moonlight in a two-piece bikini on a yacht and somehow some people who weren’t meant to see it found out. You know, the usual story. That’s exactly what happened to 30-year old Florida teacher Tiffany Shepherd. To be honest with you, she’s not even all that hot — a mildly attractive girl with ugly tattoos and a huge rack. Wait, did I say she wasn’t even all that hot? I meant, she’s incredibly hot. The huge rack really helps, you know. An actual news report (yes, an actual news report) on her firing and some gratuitous shots of her in bikini via a video salute. God bless the public education system. And the Internets.

Let’s face it, hot girls with pretty faces and killer bodies are a dime a dozen in today’s age, but one that comes with a Bachelor’s degree in Anthropology and a specialty in creative writing? That’s exactly what model Nicola Mar has in her bag of goodies. Mar writes on her official site that her passions include writing, traveling, and photography, which is about three passions more than your average bimbette model. Mind you, not that we here at the Random Page have anything against bimbette models; heck, we wouldn’t have any reasons to get out of bed in the morning without them. But you know, every now and then, it’s nice to see a model with brains, too. Of course, the pretty face and killer body don’t hurt, either.

We posted Spanish actress Leonor Watling last year in anticipation of her new movie “The Oxford Murders” — well, okay, not really, we were just using the movie as an excuse to post pictures of her. Then Leonor Watling went and showed up on the cover and in the pages of MAN magazine, which I think is, like, a magazine for man. Or men. Or maybe it really is just for one man. Hey, wouldn’t it be funny if the magazine was made for a man named Man? That would be, you know, really weird, but also really cool. Or maybe just really stupid. Either/or. Anyways, here’s some more Leonor Watling in MAN mag looking, as the kids would say, all kinds of hot and junk.

Singing diva Mariah Carey was never one to keep that nice, voluptuous body of hers hidden behind all that junk girls like to call clothes in her music videos and pretty much wherever she showed up, and as a member of the male species, I’d like to thank her for that open-minded attitude. Word is, Mariah has gotten hitched to some 20-something kid who also raps and acts in movies, and occasionally shows up on MTV or BET or one of those cable shows I try to avoid whenever possible, lest my delicate senses be overrun with crap. I bring all that up to say this: Mariah Carey is in the current issue of Vibe magazine, sporting that diva-ish body in a variety of swimwear.

Let’s face it, no one goes on the game show Deal or No Deal and pays any attention to the models. Or at least, most of the girls don’t. The guys? Well, they’re probably DISTRACTED by the models. Too distracted to, you know, pick numbers, and stuff. (God, is this game for retards or what?) In any case, when the game show puts your SISTER on the game as one of the models, and the host keeps telling you to LOOK at her, don’t you? Apparently not so much, because the contestant on this edition of Deal or No Deal is completely clueless. Not her fault, since it appears her mom is also retarded. “She has to feel it”, says the retarded sister, when prodded by the host to LOOK at the models.

Okay, so yeah, it’s been ages since I made an entry into the Random Supermodel of the Day category, but give me a break, do you know how hard it is to find these girls? It’s not like they come around every other week; there’s a limited number of supermodels, you know. But hey, whose whining? The latest entry is one Esther Canadas, a Spanish actress and supermodel originally from Alicante, Costa Blanca. Among her cinematic credits include an appearance in “The Thomas Crown Affair” remake and “Enslavement: The True Story of Fanny Kemble”, which is, you know, the true story of Fanny Kemble, I don’t know if you knew.

I’ve posted Jodi Albert a couple of times before, but when a girl is this easy on the eyes, what the hell, why not a third or fourth time? Jodi Albert is an actress, and a former member of the all-girl band Girl Thing, and she’s currently engaged to Westlife member Kian Egan. Westlife, in case you don’t know, is an all-boy band that does pop music ala N’Sync, The Backstreet Boys, and their ilk. You know, the type of music no one listens to anymore? Anyways, Jodi Albert is a former Hollyoaks babe, and currently spends her time visiting my lustful night dreams. I pay SAG wages, doncha know.

What’s that, you say? You want more of Katrina Kaif? Well damn, okay, don’t write me letters, here she is! Who is Katrina Kaif? She is a Bollywood actress, and although I’ve never seen one of her movies, she’s certainly worth keeping up with, if only because that is one gorgeous face and that body ain’t too shabby, either. She’s got 5 movies coming out in 2008, which, by Bollywood standards, I’m told that’s actually not that many. The average actresses do 30 movies a year. Or at least that’s what my Indian buddy Kareem tells me, but then again, he’s always been such a liar.

From the wonderful wide world of the Big Brother universe (or is that the wonderful wide universe of Big Brother?), comes another blonde hottie from Down Under, aka Australia. Her name is Jo Ashton, and has she done anything post her appearance on Big Brother Australia? I have absolutely no idea. One hopes so, because let’s face it, that is one fine looking woman, and it would suck if she disappeared into a kitchen somewhere in the suburbs cooking for some dork who works at the local electrical power company. Or some such. Anyhoo, a small dose of Jo Ashton to chew on.

Our Latin Flavor of the day is one Zaira Nara. Who is Zaira Nara? Um, besides the fact that she’s a real gem when modeling a two-piece bikini (which she seems to do often, if these pictures are any indication), I have absolutely no idea. And you know what? I don’t care to find out. Call me superficial, call me lacking in substance, call me anything, as long as you call me, because I’m so gosh darn lonely. Seriously, someone please call me! Ahem. Where was I? Oh right, Zaira Nara is really hot, and we’d like to thank her genes for the hard work. It’s much appreciated.

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds are engaged? Damn. I didn’t even know they were dating! Then again, it’s not like I keep up with celebrity dating habits, mostly because these people date different people every other day, and I just don’t care nearly enough. But hey, whenever someone manages to not only nab Scarlett Johansson, but take her off the market for the rest of us, then I’m very interested. Word from the AP is that the two actors are engaged — Johnasson is 23 and Reynolds is 31. Or at least, that’s the news according to Johansson’s publicist, although no wedding date has been scheduled.

Gwyneth Paltrow is always hit and miss with me. On the one side, she’s got that classic Hollywood beauty about her, one of those faces when you see you think, “Now that’s how an American beauty should look like.” On the negative side, she apparently didn’t like being American enough, so she hopped across the pond to marry a Brit and named her kid Apple, of all things. But if you’ve seen the commercials for “Iron Man”, then you know Gwyneth Paltrow is back to her Hollywood hotness phase. Here she is in GQ Magazine, looking hotter than I’ve ever seen her. This is what we call sexy classy without being slutty. Take notes, Christina Aguilera, et al.

Wikipedia describes parkour as, “an activity with the aim of moving from one point to another as efficiently and quickly as possible, using principally the abilities of the human body.” Basically, “pulling a Jackie Chan”. It was founded by a French guy name David Belle, which explains why the French are very good at it. The guys, anyway. But what about the girls? Um, not so much. Someone put this professionally made video about some “parkour girls” in London. Apparently this is one of those, “if guys can do it, we can do it better” deals. The problem is, they can’t do it better. See the comparisons for yourself.

Pamela David is an Argentinian model and TV host, and what the kids would call really, really hot. Or if this was the late ’90s, and Jim Carrey’s movie “The Mask” had just come out, they would call her ssssssssssssssssmoking. Either way you put it, the woman is worth revisiting every now and then, especially when she keeps putting out very nice looking pictures of herself in a bikini or lingerie, because let’s face it, when God gives you this face and that body, hiding it behind a layer of clothing is just downright criminal and just not right. Thank God for Pamela David and her ability to wear as little clothes as possible.