Hey, fans of cheesy 1980s cartoon shows, rejoice, because one of your shows, “G.I. Joe” is coming to a big screen near you! That’s right, they’re making a live-action, big-budget action movie based off the G.I. Joe cartoon and toy line, and they’ve nabbed the gorgeous Rachel Nichols to play Scarlett. You remember Scarlett — the superhot redhead in the show with the bow and kick-ass can-do attitude. Yeah, her. Well, they couldn’t have gotten a better actress for the role than Rachel Nichols, who although she’s mostly known as a blonde, I’ve seen her with redhead before, such as in these pictures. Now that’s a nice looking redhead!
Italian pop star Laura Pausini has a great voice, so it’s too bad I don’t understand a single thing she’s singing about. More about her from
The big hullabalub around Hollywood water coolers this week is not whether Jodie Foster is gay (the general consensus seems to be that everyone has always known, they just didn’t want to talk about it), but whether she’s come out of the closet, perhaps accidentally? This all stems from a
Duke Nukem is back, bitches, so hide the kids and grandmas cause it’s gonna hurt! Okay, so maybe this thing has been in development, like, FOREVER, but maybe we’ll finally get it in 2007 — or 2008. Hell, I’ll be happy if this thing comes out this decade! Duke Nukem is one of the original bad boys of first-person shooters, and for my money, one of the most entertaining games out there. (How many other games out there have strippers doing their pole dance while you’re running around shooting alien scum?) Game developer 3D Realms has released a teaser trailer for Duke Nukem Forever, and is promising the release of the game sometime … well, sometime in this lifetime, hopefully. Geez, when was the first time we heard about this one, 2001??? Anyhoo, the teaser.
Man, it sure doesn’t suck to be Dallas Quarterback stud Tony Romo. Then again, after Romo’s atrocious play last weekend against the Philadelphia Eagles, maybe it does kinda suck to be Tony Romo. But his love life is certainly something that doesn’t suck; after goofing off with country music princess Carrie Underwood, Romo is now plying his trade with pop princess Jessica Simpson. He’s now dabbled in two extreme opposites in two different musical genres, and some people are saying he should go back to the country music girl because the pop princess may be partying our boy too hard. If you were Tony Romo, what would YOU do? Carrie Underwood vs. Jessica Simpson — WHO YA GOT??
Holy Mother of God, what happened? Wasn’t it just a few days ago that I posted some Tara Reid bikini pictures and mentioned that she was looking kinda good? And then these popped up online and — oh wow, what is going on here? Tara Reid has always had a little something “off” going on with that stomach of hers, and now it doesn’t look like the poor girl has eaten a single thing in weeks. She’s practically sagging at the bones. Okay, a couple of the pictures look okay, but there are a few that just looks downright disturbing. Someone give this girl a hamburger, stat!
You can’t keep a bad girl down. Debra Lafave, the former middle school teacher who is currently doing a little house arrest for having sex with a student, made an appearance in a Hillsborough County, Florida courtroom Tuesday to face more charges. The latest reason The Man is using to try to put everyone’s favorite sexy teacher back in prison? It’s some lame excuse involving “contact with an underage female co-worker at a restaurant where she worked”, says
It’s been a while since we last heard from German TV personality, hostess, actress, model, and in her spare time, defeater of terrorist scum Jennifer Sebnem Schaefer, or as she’s known to her friends, Jen Seb Schaf. No, really. Um, but perhaps not. Which reminds me of a story — which I would take this opportunity to tell you, except I sort of forgot the important details, and when you’re telling a story, what’s the point if you don’t recall the details? Exactly. What was I saying? Oh right, German babe Jennifer Sebnem Schaefer is back, and she’s looking as good as ever. What is it about a hot girl with a gun…?
Remember that time when Janet Jackson was looking really good, so good that she showed a boob during the Superbowl? You gotta be pretty hot, and feeling pretty hot, to pull something like that. Then, do you remember when Janet Jackson stopped being hot, and just got really, really fat? Well that was then, and this is now, and now Janet Jackson is looking good again. Or maybe this is an old photoshoot. Either way, the body is tight again, the abs are getting flat again, and those boobies (fake? not fake? who knows and who cares) are looking glorious again. Remember when Janet Jackson was hot, then not hot, and then hot again?
It’s only thirty seconds of Lost, but when you haven’t gotten lost in a while (the season 4 premiere doesn’t start until January 31st 2008), any second are precious seconds. And so, Lost fans, here is the 30-second teaser trailer for your show. “Every person on this island will be killed,” says Mister Creepy Eyes. Surprisingly, nothing from Creepy Smiling Lady, aka Elizabeth Mitchell, who in case I didn’t mention it, is really, really frakkin’ creepy looking. So the question remains: Who gets to nail Kate this time, and can they please get a mattress? Is that too much to ask?
God Bless Reality TV. Sure, it’s full of crap and nothing on it is “real” in the least (seriously, anyone who thinks the crap that goes on in MTV’s “The Real World” is real needs to be put to sleep because we can’t allow your kind to propagate), but it has given us a lot of really hot girls that we might normally never have realized. Girls like Trista Rehn, who lost out on ABC’s The Bachelor, and immediately hopped into the pages of Maxim for this delightful spread. It worked, and Trista’s 15 minutes was expanded, landing her a couple of specials and guest spots on TV shows like According to Jim. Okay, so maybe landing a guest spot on According to Jim isn’t exactly something to brag about, but you know what I mean.
Ask anyone, and they’ll tell you — I’ve always said that Geri Halliwell, aka Ginger Spice, was my favorite on the Spice Rack. Okay, so maybe I never actually said that to anyone, but I always meant to, and really, that’s almost as good as actually saying it. Am I right or am I right? Um, probably not. In any case, more Geri Halliwell bikini pictures, because, why the hell not? Hell, you can give me Geri Halliwell in a bikini all day and I’ll never complain; Posh Spice and her stick figure and fake rack has got nothing on Ginger Spice.
Geeks, point up your geek antennaes, because the Dark Knight teaser trailer is here, and oh my frakkin’ God does it look good or does it look good? I’m so lovin’ the gritty, down-to-Earth aura Nolan is doing with this one. And the Joker? Holy crap. Heath Ledger freaks me out, man. I don’t know what kind of make-up they’re using for his face, but it looks soooooooooo creepy. Seriously, wow. Check out the trailer for the movie below. The film is due out sometime next year. Probably Summer, since this kind of movie was built for Summer. Damn it’s good!
In her recent appearance in Men’s Fitness magazine, the title is, “Grown and Gorgeous”. Okay, I agree with the second part, but since when has Rachael Leigh Cook NOT been grown? She wasn’t a child star, was she? Because if she was, I don’t recall. Rachael Leigh Cook is now twenty-eight years old, but it sure feels like she’s been around for the longest time, doesn’t it? Or maybe it’s just that blasted “your brains on drug” commercial that keeps sticking to my mind whenever I recall Rachael Leigh Cook’s name. And of course, she did do that Godawful teen movie “She’s All That”. But then again, all teen movies are Godawful to my old, crabby mind. “Get off my lawn!” Ahem.
According to her Myspace page, Australian model Erin Normoyle has been modeling since she was twelve years old. Which is pretty damn astounding, because when I was twelve, I was still trying to figure out why the toilet water goes in one direction, but not the other. And then there was that whole mystery about why girls smell good even when they don’t. But I digress. Erin Normoyle recently made FHM’s Sexiest Woman in the World list, topping off at #45. And her motto? “Ride Till I Die”. Which is a surprise, because that’s my motto, too. Except, um, I’m pretty sure she’s referring to dirt bikes, and I’m not. If you know what I mean, and I think you do. Hint hint, wink wink.
You hear that? That’s the sound of some scummy soldier intent on raping the poor, lovely flower that is Julie Benz screaming in pain as Rambo guts him from ear to ear. Yep, there is buckets and buckets of blood in the latest Rambo sequel, to just be called “Rambo”, which I guess is kinda cool. It’s like “Rocky”, except, um, “Rambo”. Hmm, what’s the deal with Sylvester Stallone in movies that starts with “R” and has 5 letter words? And check it out, both titles are the names of his characters. Coincidence? I think not! Anyhoo. “Rambo” opens January 25th, 2008, and here are some stills from it. How badass does this thing look? As badass as Rambo trying to stab you with a snake. I mean, come on, that’s hardcore! You scared yet? Julie Benz is.
“American Pie” was more than eight years ago, but it mind as well be twenty for the good it did Shannon Elizabeth’s movie career. Okay, so it basically launched her movie career, or what little she has at the moment, because without it who knows where she would be. And where is that, exactly? Um, I’m not sure. I haven’t seen a whole lot of Shannon Elizabeth in the movies lately. If she’s been in any A-list pictures, then it must have been small roles, because I haven’t heard the name “Shannon Elizabeth” anywhere besides ESPN, where she plays annually at the World Series of Poker Main Event for as long as I’ve started watching about 4-5 years ago. In any case, we like to think that Shannon Elizabeth is out there getting ready to burst back onto the scene, but perhaps we’re just too optimistic.
It’s official, boys — December is shaping up to be a bad month; first, some guy knocks up Jessica Alba, and now a nobody actor has taken Ali Larter off the market. That’s right: TV star and soon to be movie star Ali Larter said Yes when actor boyfriend Hayes MacArthur poppped the question over the weekend, reports

21 December 2007
Rachel Nichols