Reese Witherspoon Finally Ditches Ryan Phillippe

31 October 2006

Topics: Celebrity Divorces, Reese Witherspoon

The big celeb news around the celeb news watercooler is that mega movie star Reese Witherspoon is separating from her actor husband Ryan Phillippe. And yes, there is a difference between being a movie star and an actor — whereas Reese gets big bucket loads of money and can open movies (as they like to say Out There), Ryan gets a paycheck and can open a can of tuna — sometimes. So after 7 years of marriage (at least three lifetimes by Hollywood standards) and two kids, the couple are a-splittin’. I tell you, this always happens — when the woman of the couple gets bigger than the man (and hasn’t Reese been bigger than Ryan for what, 5 years now?), the man can never take it, and divorce is inevitable. See Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey for an example, or Jennifer Garner and Scott Foley, or Jennifer Lopez and that back-up dancer she married, etc etc. ‘Tis life in vain Hollywood.

Anyhoo, here’s what Ryan Phillippe won’t be hitting anymore. Dumb, insecure bastard.

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