Hardwired Trailer Will Blow Your Mind. Not Really.

CubaThose with rich, rewarding lives may be unaware of the fact that both Val Kilmer and Cuba Gooding, Jr. have become the undisputed kings of the direct-to-video market, outranking both Steven Seagal and Jean-Claude Van Damme in terms of overall output. Kilmer’s face can be found on an unusually large number of new titles released over the past six months, with Cuba coming in at a very close second. It’s sad, really, especially considering these guys are capable of so much more. Truthfully, the only thing left for these two fallen stars to do is appear in the same movie together, perhaps a sci-fi yarn about a guy with a strange implant surgically grafted onto his brain. Lance Henriksen and Michael Ironside should definitely co-star.

“Hardwired,” directed by “Cube Zero” mastermind Ernie Barbarash, valiantly attempts to harness the DTV power of Val Kilmer and Cuba Gooding, Jr., though judging from the trailer, the filmmaker certainly has his work cut out for him. I’m not saying the film looks like a complete waste of time, but it does look like another low-budget sci-fi jaunt with its foot stuck in a can of processed cheese.

Here’s what’s on-deck:

After a tragic accident claims the lives of Luke Gibson’s (Gooding Jr.) wife and unborn child, he is left with critical injuries and complete amnesia. A new technological breakthrough from the Hexx Corporation – a Psi-Comp Implant that’s hardwired into Luke’s brain – saves his life, but Luke soon finds out that this new technology comes with a price and that the Hexx Corporation harbors sinister plans for the new device. With the help of new allies, Luke tries to recover the memories of his past while uncovering the Hexx Corporation’s true motives.

I’ll watch it, but I probably won’t be too happy about it. The film makes it DVD debut courtesy of Sony Pictures Home Entertainment on November 3rd. Check out the trailer below if you fancy having your mind properly scrambled.