Is Chandni Chowk to China the Greatest Movie Ever Made?

Is “Chandni Chowk to China” the greatest movie ever made, or is “Chandni Chowk to China” possibly the greatest movie ever made? Well okay, it’s probably not the greatest, that honor still goes to “The Hottie and the Nottie” (I vote Hottie!), but it’s pretty damn close. At least, judging by this trailer. The film is about an Indian (from India, not the Native American kind) nobody who is told he’s the reincarnation of a great Chinese warrior, and sent to China to save a village from bandits, or gangsters, or some such. You know, bad guys. He encounters a beautiful woman and much dancing and singing ensue. This is a Bollywood movie, after all. Not having singing and dancing in a Bollywood movie is like not having incest in an Art House movie from France.

From the hustle-bustle of Chandni Chowk to the hutongs of Beijing, the electric energy of Shanghai and sheer breathtaking Chinese landscapes, Chandni Chowk To China chronicles the lunatic adventures of a hapless simpleton cook from Delhi. As he goes to seek his destiny, he finds himself thrown into a crazy world of megalomaniac villains, femme fatales, crazy inventors, Chinese mysticism and outlandish kung-fu assassins!

Starring a bunch of people you’ve never heard of (at least, if you don’t live in India), but featuring some wacky comedy and even wackier wire-fu. This has all the makings of a “Kung Fu Hustle” hit — except with, you know, even more singing and dancing. And a funky porn ’stache.

Behold: “Chandni Chowk to China”.

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