Jennifer’s Body Has No Megan Fox Boobage? Foul!

Sometime Friday last week, someone sent a review in to the boys over at with their review of the horror-comedy “Jennifer’s Body”, starring Megan Fox as a hot-to-trot cheerleader who is possessed by pure evil and goes around eating boys, and it’s up to her best friend, a social outcast named “Needy” (gee, way to go with the subtlety there, boys) to stop her or die trying. Well, probably not die trying, but one can only hope. Anyways, the review was not exactly positive, but the really big news? After all the hoopla over the rumor (and teen fantasies that were conjured as a result of it), there is apparently no Megan Fox nude scene to be found in the movie. Well beat me with a stick and call me Sally.

Here’s part of the negative review at Joblo:

To describe it in one word? Schizophrenic. The film continuously switches gears and like a first time driver with stick shift, it happens to fast and the car dies (in this case the film falls flat). Dark comedy? Yes there is a scene where J.K. Simmons thinks a youth screaming is just mourning and yes that was funny but that was just about the only scene where people laughed because it was meant to be funny. This movie is one of those cases where we weren’t laughing WITH you. We are laughing AT you.

The film’s performances are pretty decent. Seyfried does as good as one could to hold up the film even though it’s this bad. Megan wasn’t horrifyingly bad but neither was she good. There was a scene where it’s a real big close up of her kissing another chick (YES!!!!). The men in the audience hooted and cheered even though it was completely random and the director put it in as a a kind of apology for not giving up the real goods (no Megan Fox boobage). Brody was a pretty quirky character as a indie singer just trying to make it in the real world but no real screen time to make it good enough. His lip syncing was dreadful as well.

You know, as gorgeous as she is, I was never convinced Megan Fox could act. She always struck me as a Denise Richards type — nice to look at, will probably have a decent career, but in 5 years from now, she’ll be stuck with her own reality TV show on the E! Channel. Then again, Denise Richards never had two “Transformers” movies to fall back on, so maybe change that 5 years to 7 years…

But in any case, after all the rumors and hullabaloo, and set pictures of Megan Fox wearing pasties and “acting” nude, there turns out not to be any nudity at all. At least, according to this one advance screening review. Unrated DVD edition, anyone?

Megan Fox