Just Married (2003) Movie Review

If you plan on watching “Just Married” for the comedy, then my suggestion is to not bother with the actual movie and to watch the film’s 2-minute trailer instead. Simply put, there isn’t any more comedy to be had in the film other than the jokes already revealed in the trailer. Save yourself the money if comedy is what you’re after.

“Just Married” stars Ashton Kutcher (“Texas Rangers”) as Tom, an average guy who meets, falls in love, and then marries spoiled rich girl Sarah (played by Brittany Murphy, last seen skanking the screen up in “8 Mile”). The movie actually opens with Tom and Sarah returning home from their honeymoon in Europe ready to tear each other apart. The film then flashes back to show how they came to be this way. If you like watching two attractive young people pretending to have chemistry and squeezing out unfunny jokes as if their life depended on it, then “Just Married” is for you. (Actually, the whole lack of chemistry thing is a bit perplexing considering that the two actors were actually dating at the time of the movie. Go figure.)

I will admit that the trailer for “Just Married” had me chuckling, but unfortunately that’s all there was to be had with the full movie — some chuckling. As characters, you can’t get anymore uninteresting than Tom and Sarah. He’s an average guy working an average job and she’s a rich princess. Of course the stuffy dad wants her to marry a man of his choosing, but she wants the “wild and free” guy that Tom is. In the end, they’ll learn that “all you need is love” or some other non-practical idealism along that line. There’s nothing original here, folks, move along.

ven for a Romantic Comedy — a genre of film with a bar that is, by its very nature quite low — “Just Married” doesn’t provide nearly enough romance or comedy. This could be explained by the general absence of the two comedic sidekicks, an aspect of Romantic Comedies that is crucial to keeping the comedy and romance at a balanced level. (If you don’t know, the leads provide the romance and the sidekicks provide the comedy.)

In “Married”, we have David Moscow as Tom’s best friend Kyle, and I believe an actress plays Sarah’s sister, although I couldn’t tell you her name since she’s barely in the movie. And since the movie spends much of its time in Europe during the disastrous honeymoon, the sidekicks are left at home where they have absolutely nothing to do with the movie.

In short, the screenplay by Sam Harper is pedestrian and tries to force much of the comedy. Director Shawn Levy offers little by way of inspiration and it’s a miracle he even managed the few chuckles that could be found here. The film’s primary draw is its two attractive leads, which means there isn’t anything here for anyone looking for something more.

Shawn Levy (director) / Sam Harper (screenplay)
CAST: Ashton Kutcher …. Tom Leezak
Brittany Murphy …. Sarah McNerney
Christian Kane …. Peter Prentis

Buy Just Married on DVD