6 Shares6 Comments
Mickey Rourke sure looks horny. You know, because his character wears a big ol mask with horns on top? Yeah, that was the joke that kept running through my head during Tarsem Singh’s unbelievably ridiculous “Immortals”. The bastard son of “Clash of the Titans” and “300” wants to be a visionary take on the same ol, same ol (apparently it’s in Singh’s contract that every press release that references him must have the phrase “visionary director” somewhere in the same sentence), but ends up just being, well, the same ol, same ol. Henry Cavill tries his best here, but he’s saddled with an awful script. The only thing that could have saved “Immortals” is if Mickey Rourke’s character had no reason to slaughter his way through the movie’s fake ass landscapes. If he was just a psycho who liked killing folks. Instead, he gets some ridiculous grudge against the Gods. Pfft. Boo hoo for you, Mickey Rourke, join the friggin’ club, man! Stop being such a bitch! By the way, the Gods in “Immortals”? For a bunch of guys that live on a giant mountain in the clouds, they sure are easy to kill.