Poster, Trailer for British Vampire Flick Dead Cert

Another vampire flick, you ask? Yes, dear readers, another vampire flick. Director Steve Lawson’s upcoming blood-sucking gangster opus “Dead Cert” actually looks pretty snazzy despite the fact that my patience with modern vampire movies is quickly running low. Granted, this one appears to be taking the tired formula in a completely different direction, but it’s hard to get genuinely excited about a project featuring vampires these days. Everyone’s got a vampire movie coming out, and if they don’t, chances are they’re getting ready to start one. “Dead Cert” certainly looks cool, and I’m willing to give it the benefit of the doubt. Good thing I’m open-minded, right?

Here’s a synopsis courtesy of

When respected but small-time gangster Freddie ‘Dead Cert’ Frankham (Craig Fairbrass) is unexpectedly given the chance to make a tentative leap into the big leagues with the opening of his new nightclub in London’s East End, he doesn’t quite realize what he is getting into. Unknown to Freddie and his partners, the club stands on the former site of a Black Church, established as a temple of evil in the 17th Century by a Romanian warlord-turned-vampire known as The Wolf. Flushed out of the city by emissaries of the Vatican during the Great Fire of London, and since then exiled in mainland Europe, The Wolf and his undead disciples have now returned to England to continue their diabolical plans to expand their legions and overcome mankind.

On the opening night of the club, Freddie is approached by an uninvited guest in the form of Dante Livienko, an Eastern European businessman, gangster and drug-dealer with a fearsome reputation. Livienko and his associates want ownership of the club and are prepared to make Freddie an offer he can’t refuse in order to get what they want. But to Freddie, his new, legitimate business means far more to him than money and he’s not about to give up his hard-earned turf without a fight. What he doesn’t know, but is soon to find out, is the man he is about to cross is a 500-year-old vampire determined to rebuild his empire of evil on its original, unhallowed site.

If you’re still with me, be sure to check out the trailer and the latest poster below. If nothing else, at least they’re not sparkling.