Punisher: War Zone Release Date Moved to December

Color me shocked. Lexi Alexander, director of “Punisher: War Zone” has updated her blog yet again. Wow! What does this make, twice in, like, three months? Holy smokes! (Just kidding, Lexi, please don’t come to my house and kick my ass. I’m delicate.) Anyhoo. According to Lexi Alexander, the powers that be have moved the release date for “Punisher: War Zone” to December 5th, 2008, just in time to douse Christmas and Jesus in buckets of blood because, you know, they have it coming anyway.

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They also moved our release date to December 5th, which is, according to my reps, a much, much better date. I myself would have thought that people will think twice about going to see an extremely violent movie the closer it gets to Jesus’ B-day, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or whatever other holy holiday you’re celebrating. Well, the box office records prove different and instead, all you sick fucks get more blood thirsty that time of year. (And I say that with lovingly affection, cause I’m relying on all the sick fucks to show up).

And there’s this pic. I would be scared for Lexi Alexander except she’s a martial artists, and could probably kick both of the guys’ asses.

Punisher: War Zone