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 arly in Brian Yuzna's Faust: Love of the Damned, a
doctor experimenting in what she calls "music therapy" to cure
psychotic patients goes into the room of one of her patients, a mass murderer
who she has only met a few minutes ago, and hands him a pen with which to write
with. Now take into account that the patient has slaughtered and sliced about 30
people just a few hours ago and is clearly insane because he's in a
straightjacket. The doctor, in her infinite wisdom, enters the
psychopath's cell even as the psychopath is writing on the wall with his own
blood and is unrestrained.
In another scene, when our fair doctor
goes to a café filled with people, she discovers that two thugs with pentagram
tattoos on their arms are after her -- what does she do? Why, she does what all
bright and educated doctors do: she flees the brightly lit and populated café
in favor of the dark alley next door! If those two little scenarios don't get
you pumped to see Faust in its entire brainless splendor, than you don't
have a sense of humor. Either that, or you have taste, which would mean you
would skip this film.
Faust is based on an underground comic book of the
same name written and illustrated by David Quinn and Tim Vigil, respectively.
The comic book had its lyrical side, and sometimes the pages actually sounded
poetic. That is, of course, if you don't consider the entire concept of a
painter who sells his soul to a Devil-like character called M, and in return
gets a pair of shiny metal cuffs that can produce two thong-like pig-stickers,
er, blades, to be a little silly.
That seems to be the entire basis for the
comic book, although it didn't seem to matter since the comic series (a
mini-series) involved a series of bloody encounters between John Jaspers (later
renamed Faust) as he takes on the cops, M's minions, and anyone else who gets in
the way of his pig stickers, er, blades. The comic book was in black and white,
and this seemed appropriate for the blood-drenched pages and poetic thoughts of
Faust. The movie adaptation, on the other hand, is nothing more than an excuse
to see how much carnage you can put on screen and still keep within a million
dollar budget.
The star of Faust is Mark Frost, an actor who looks
like a permanently-constipated Jim Carrey -- how else can you explain the
"Oh my God I can't believe this is happening" expression with the
wide-open mouth and the "Oh my God I can't believe this is happening"
expression with the droopy face. Mark Frost has as much range as that turkey
about to be someone's Thanksgiving dinner. The man is simply an embarrassment to
the acting profession. Of course he's in good company, since no one in Faust
seems to be able to act. Or speak their English dialogue, for that matter, as
more than half of the cast have their English dialogues dubbed over.
In fact,
I'm not sure if any of the cast is American. Isabel Brook (the not-so-smart
Doctor Jade de Camp) has a British accent that gets mixed in with her attempt at
an American accent. The rest of the cast must not have even tried an American
accent, since their dubbed over voice was obviously not their own. (How do I
know? Well for one the mouth movements and dialogue doesn't match!) Although
Andrew Divoff (M) seems to be the only undubbed voice along with Brook.
Bad acting aside, Faust suffers from a lack of
respect for good, competent storytelling. The movie takes place over the course
of a night (or so it seems) but looks disjointed, as if it's taking place over a
couple of weeks, or days at the least. And yet, in that one night, Jade becomes
obsessed and falls head-over-heels in love with Jaspers, who responds in kind.
Gee, what kind of love pills are these two downing? Director Brian Yuzna's
obsession with repetitive and disgusting gore doesn't help the film.
What Yuzna
mistakes for a good story is a series of scenes where Faust shoves his pig
stickers into a person's stomach and the blades exit their backs. That, and
Faust slicing off people's hands. I must have counted at least a dozen times
when Faust slices off someone's hand at the wrist. Save much on special effects,
Brian? How about creativity?
Films like Faust are low budget, and this explains
why it was shot in Spain, which I think is supposed to represent New York. (The
comic book takes place in New York.) Foreign locations, of course, cost less
because the crew labor is cheaper than the unionized crew in the States. For
about half of the movie I was wondering where the movie was shot, which helped
me to keep my mind off the miserable experience of having to sit through the
film itself.
Ironically, the main character in Faust makes a pact
with the Devil to get his revenge -- I only wish getting back the hour and a
half I wasted on this movie was so easy.
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