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 t's
rare these days to find a horror film that strays even a little bit outside of
genre conventions; it's even worse with the teen slasher subgenre. Dark
corridors, scared teens, thunder and lightning, and a knife wielding slasher all
figure prominently into the story. Unfortunately, the subgenre hasn't been fresh
since it was started back in the late '70s and early '80s by "Halloween"
and "A
Nightmare On Elm Street, followed by a litany of third rate sequels and
bastardized offspring. Films like "Scream"
and "Jeepers
Creepers" are examples of recent attempts to revive the genre by taking
the tried-and-true formula and infusing it with slick production values and a
self-referential script. Alas, the inevitable litany of substandard sequels
followed, and we're back to square one.
"Nine Lives" is a recent mid-budget genre entry
set in the frozen moors of Scotland, where nine wealthy teens arrive at an
opulent country manor for a sort of last high school reunion before heading off
to college. They spend the night eating, drinking and reminiscing about their
high school exploits at the usual Euro yuppie getaways (Paris, New York, Monte
Carlo, etc.). But the discovery of a strange book releases an evil force
thirsting for centuries overdue revenge, and what starts out as a joyful meeting
of good friends turns into a harrowing night of murder and mayhem as the sordid
history of the manor is revealed.
It's a promising concept, but one that has been seen before
in "The Evil Dead"
and "Ghosts of
Mars." Oh, and did I say Paris? That's right, Paris Hilton is one of
the stars of "Nine Lives". In fact, Hilton's presence in the cast is
the film's main marketing point, which is plainly obvious by the fact that she's
front and center on the box art and is the only recognizable name in the cast.
Hilton plays -- what else? -- a spoiled American socialite who shops on three
continents in one day. The script is even clever enough to take a few jabs at
Hilton's real-life social standing, even mentioning that she's been on the cover
of a few sleaze rags in her day. That would be pretty funny if it weren't so
prophetic. Remember that "Nine Lives" was released in 2002, a full two
years before the infamous nightvision videos and hacked Sidekick. On the bright
side, Hilton does show some skin, but it's painfully obvious she wasn't hired
for her thespian skills. Reprieve comes for the viewer quickly though, as Paris'
screentime is abruptly cut short.
The rest of the cast is made up of largely unknown British
teens. Only the pretty and spunky Vivienne Harvey makes any sort of impression
as the amazingly perceptive Lucy. And herein lies "Nine Lives'"
biggest flaw. Since we don't get to know any of the characters, it's tough to
care when they get bumped off. The exposition scenes involve the kids sitting at
the dinner table talking about who went skiing where and who bought whom what
bling. Hardly informative, not to mention doing little by way of character
development beyond confirming that these kids are spoiled brats.
The script is serviceable, but naturally doesn't hold
up under scrutiny. The dialogue is pedestrian, but that is in keeping with genre
conventions and isn't much of a surprise. Fortunately there aren't any groan
inducing lines (until the end, at least) and the characters don't all run off
down dark corridors by themselves at the first opportunity. To its credit,
"Nine Lives" doesn't resort to the tired 'sex = death' cliché either.
In fact, the only titillation on hand is the brief peek-a-boo of a barely
clothed Hilton, but if all you wanted to see was Hilton in her nude glory, there are
other videos out there for such a purpose.
In "Nine
Lives", the filmmakers have decided to go with the 'death to all involved'
approach. Not the cleverest route, but it does keep things simple. There are
also a few sly jabs at Scottish thriftiness thrown in for good measure, but I
suspect that only Brits and Scots will catch these. The film's major misstep is
a tacked on and overly sentimental voiceover at the end that attempts to explain
the evil entity's motivation. It's pointless, since there wasn't much of a goal
defined for the entity to achieve and what was given was executed
inconsistently. If anything, it seemed as if the filmmakers were just trying to
pad the film's running time.
"Nine Lives" isn't the worst horror film you
can see. The setting is suitably creepy, the cast is easy on the eyes, and the
film does manage to pull off something that is very rare for the genre -- the
characters are drawn and performed in such a way that they doesn't engender
hatred in the viewer. That alone makes "Nine Lives" a tolerable
viewing experience.
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