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 n another life, Forrest Smith's script for
"Paparazzi" must have been a "Columbo" movie of the
week. At least, that's my guess. Evidence number one: Dennis Farina, playing
a police Detective, is basically Columbo minus the old wrinkled trenchcoat
and cigars. Somewhere along the way, Smith figured out that he could turn
his old, unsold "Columbo" script into a movie about bloodthirsty
paparazzi and the Hollywood action star that refuse to take their crap
anymore. Or at least that's my theory as to the origins of
"Paparazzi". But then again, I could be wrong.
"Paparazzi" is the kind
of movie you would think Hollywood would make more often. Not because it's
particularly good, but because it does the things movie stars like George
Clooney and Brad Pitt, men who can green light a movie with a nod, wishes
they could do, which is beat up on the piranhas that harasses them for the
sake of eliciting anger that they can then photograph and sell for a lot of
money. In this case, Mel Gibson, a man known for his dislike of the
paparazzi, fronted the money to turn Forrest Smith's script into reality,
and even provides a blink-and-you'll-miss cameo along with a lot of other
big name stars. (Chris Rock has a long cameo as a pizza deliveryman.)
The film stars Cole Hauser ("Pitch
Black") as Bo Laramie, a rising action star who finds the
luxuries of fame to his liking, but the media attention less than
flattering. Bo's biggest problem is Rex Harper (Tom Sizemore, "Saving
Private Ryan"), who just oozes sleaze out of every pore. Along
with a posse of three, including one of the Baldwin brothers (they're all
so husky nowadays that it's hard to tell them apart), Harper pursues Bo
relentless, even going so far as to provoke a physical attack just to
capture it on video. Later, the foursome forces Bo into a car accident
that leaves Bo's son in a coma and wife Robin Tunney popping sedative
pills.
What's an action star to do? As you probably guessed,
he goes on a warpath, which begins quite inadvertently, but leaves the
fine taste of revenge resting nicely on Bo's lips. One by one, Bo tracks
down and turns the tables on Harper and company, using the men's own vices
against them. Meanwhile, Dennis Farina, doing his best Columbo impression,
is skulking in the background, and finding that all the circumstantial
evidence points to Bo. Watching Farina, it's not hard to imagine Peter
Falk in the role. It's basically a carbon copy of what Falk used to do on
TV for years, further supporting my theory that "Paparazzi" was
once a "Columbo" movie script.
The truth is that "Paparazzi" is a B-movie
that somehow lucked into a $20 million budget. First-time director Paul
Abascal doesn't do a terrible job, but his biggest nemesis is the PG-13
rating, which keeps the film from fulfilling its potential as a brutal
revenge film. As such, the movie lacks almost everything one would
associate with an R-rated movie like "Man
on Fire", including bloody kills and ruthless action. Actually,
the "action scenes" in Bo's movie within a movie are more
exciting than what Bo gets to do in "real life" versus the
paparazzi. It's all a little lackluster, to be honest.
One particular killing, involving a bat, is never
even seen. The ending, when Harper ditches his camera for a gun, is so
anti-climactic that you keep waiting for the real ending to show up, and
when it never does, you feel cheated. What also never shows up are Rex
Harper's reasons for being such a vindictive bastard. The movie never even
hints at a reason behind Harper's insane behavior, including the drug rape
of a woman he picks up at a bar. If the film had even made an attempt to
tell us a little bit about our villain, "Paparazzi" would have
been better for it.
Without a doubt, the biggest thing holding
"Paparazzi" back is the decision not to go gritty and dark. The
film looks like the movie premieres that Bo goes to -- glitzy and bright,
and not the least bit "real". And with a short 80-minute running
time, there's not a lot of room for "Paparazzi" to work out its
kinks. Not that Smith's script is up to the task, mind you. It's all over
the place, and sometimes you wonder why Farina is even in the movie, since
his character really has no impact on the film's conclusion. Maybe
incorporating that unused "Columbo" script wasn't such a great
idea after all.
The one bright spot in "Paparazzi" is Cole
Hauser, who is one of those actors who deserves a bigger profile than they
currently possess. Hauser has always played second fiddle to bigger named
stars like Vin Diesel and (gasp!) Paul Walker (in "2
Fast 2 Furious"). Can you believe Paul "I talk, walk, sound,
and can't act just like Keanu Reeves" Walker is more famous, and more
"bankable", than a man of Hauser's talents? If this doesn't
prove to you that Hollywood is royally screwed up, nothing will.
Alas, after "Paparazzi's" poor showing at
the box office, it doesn't look as if Hauser's star will be rising any
time soon. Which is too bad, because some of the best moments of
"Paparazzi" is watching Hauser's face as Harper et al continues
to cross him. You can practically see the bloodlust gathering behind his
eyes, and his mind churning, forming plans to get back at the vultures...
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