Unable to cope or come to terms with the genius of Uwe Boll, American movie theaters are banning together to limit the Uber German’s latest release, the movie adaptation of the videogame “Postal”. In a press release, Doctor Boll states that he had expected to put “Postal” out wide into 1500 theaters, but will not have to settle for a lousy four theaters across the great United States of America.
Kotaku has the Great Deutch’s press release:
Theatrical distributors are boycotting Postal because of its political content. We were prepared to open on 1500 screens all across America on May 23rd. Any multiplex in the U.S. should have space for us, but they’re afraid… We have even tried to buy a few screens in New York and Los Angeles, and they won’t let us even rent the theaters! I urge independent exhibitors to contact us and book ‘Postal’! Audiences have been expecting the film and I don’t think exhibitors should censor what gets played in U.S. theaters.
How dare they stifle the greatness of Doctor Boll? Damn you and your political sensitivity, America! I blame it all on the Bush Administration. Let’s face it, they can’t handle the truth that Uwe is trying to deliver to the masses. He’s like Paul Revere, only without a horse. And stuff.
Here are some of “Postal’s” genius becuase, you know, you’ll probably not see the movie anyway.