Under Development: Gremlins Remake in 3D

MarketSaw says they have it on good authority that the ’80s horror-comedy “Gremlins” is currently being developed as a remake — in stereoscopic 3D! I’m guessing that means it’s 3D, only more stereoscopic-er, and thus, cooler. Still means you have to wear those ridiculously uncomfortable glasses, though, which is, as I’ve said many times, currently the bane of my existence in today’s 3D-gone-mad world of ours.

The remake is still in the early stages at the moment, but rest assured, it’s coming. Frankly, I’m shocked it’s taken this long. The original, which boasts quite the resume behind the camera — including Joe Dante as director, Steven Spielberg as producer, and Chris Columbus as writer — spawned a sequel and both co-starred the incredibly hot Phoebe Cates. Cates is still looking pretty good now, but back then in the ’80s? Holy mother of God.

The first one was generally beloved by fans of the genre, and concerned a strange looking pet bought by a traveling salesman from a pet store run by a mysterious Chinese man (ain’t that always the case?). The man is given three rules to follow, and should he not follow said rules, disaster will strike. The man gives the pet to his son, who proceeds to break all three rules, as boys are wont to do. The result? An assload of evil, mischievous gremlins appear to wreak havoc on his small town.

Which once again should remind all you kids out there — never, ever buy anything from mysterious Chinese men in little corner shops. That’s what Amazon.com is for.

He's so cute, forget about feeding him after midnight, you'll want to cram the food down his cute little throat.