Weep, Fanboys: Details on David E. Kelley’s Wonder Woman TV Show Surfaces

Lynda Carter as Wonder WomanOh my.

Frankly, I expected this. You don’t hand over a comic book character to a guy like David E. Kelley and expect the second coming of “Batman Begins”. At worst, you’re hoping he doesn’t turn Diana Prince into a mouthy lawyer who does eccentric things in her spare time like S&M or brandishing handguns to shoot rats in her office; at best, you’re hoping — Oh, who am I kidding? I saw this coming a mile away.

What am I talking about? Well, the boys at Bleeding Cool have gotten their hands on that “Wonder Woman” pilot script by David E. Kelley, and let me tell you, it’s a doozy, if by “doozy” you mean “Holy shit, this is SO not going to turn out good at all.”

BC says there are some similarities to the Wonder Woman comic book character, like Steve Trevor crashing on WW’s island and then bringing her to NY, bullet-deflecting bracelets, and jets. Not invisible ones, apparently, but “a whole rainbow’s worth of over coloured aircraft”, whatever that means. WW’s nemesis will be “Veronica Cale, who in this continuity is an evil scientist and rival businesswoman with a secret, nefarious plan.”

The differences? Quite a bit.

Instead of having two identities, this Wonder Woman has three. The third identity is that of Diana Themyscyra, the head of Themyscyra Industries. Ala Tony Stark and Iron Man, everyone knows that WW is Diana Themyscyra, which means WW is no secret vigilante, but rather a celebrity with toys modeled after her, etc. Think Ozymandias in “Watchmen”. WW uses her civilian guise of Diana Prince to get around and do her investigating.

And oh yeah, she also has sidekicks. Yes, sidekicks. Or as BC puts it, “a CSI-ish group of science-nerd 20-somethings living in her basement that dance to Kanye West”. Oy vey. Wonder Woman also shows up in costume for a whopping two times in the entire pilot. Hey, when you have CSI nerds doing the investigatin’ for ya, why bother dressing up, right?

There are more details over at Bleeding Cool. I suggest heading over there to weep. Er, I mean, read.

Wonder Woman Tiara