As far as I can tell, the only people — and I use that term loosely — who continue to watch the “Scary Movie” franchise are horny teenagers, corrupt government officials, and those with exceptionally bad taste in film. Regardless of what my elitist opinion may be, somebody out there is watching these abominations, since the sequels and its neverending legion of knock-offs continue to infect the nation’s cinematic vernacular at a mad rapid pace. Then again, I guess it’s really no different than the “Police Academy” films I grew up with. Did I mention that I proudly own the entire series? Perhaps that’s a secret best kept in the dark.
The news-minded folks over at Cinema Blend are reporting that the Weinstein Company is forgoing “Scary Movie 5” in favor of a reboot. Genius or madness? I’m honestly not sure. As much as I hate the term “reboot” and the theory behind it, curiosity may get the better of me. According to sources, we’ll have to wait until somebody delivers “Scream 4” before we can burn our eyes on this monstrosity, which means I’ll have plenty of time to properly amass a snarky collection of thoughts and feelings on the subject.
And people wonder why I spend so much time watching foreign movies.